The Truth About Me-self

It's 3 in the morning and I haven't slept yet. In fact, I was out with my friend till now. I had a particularly difficult day today. This friend of mine who is also a colleague was a great comfort for me in my lonely hours. He is the only person with whom I had a one on one open hearted conversations in the past few months. It was in no time that we became good friends from being mere colleagues. He's also my beer-buddy! Besides, he's the only person of my age as my friend in town. So, his sudden announcement of resignation from job did bother me a lot. I felt very distracted and couldn't put my mind in whatever I was doing. After the office hours, I came back home and sat locked in my room as usual. But by about 10'o clock I decided to pay him a visit at his bachelor's room and I didn't wait another minute. We sat there discussing about a lot of things as usual and by around 12.30 I suggested that we'd go out for a ride and he immediately obliged....

Ah! To begin with, I must admit that I feel a lot relieved and am breathing fresh air again. The last two weeks had been an emotionally unstable one. I feel too high one day only to wake up feeling too down the next day. And why all this? 'coz I've been gambling with a lot of fancies, thoughts and impulses. I tried to rationalize with my fancies I have for a girl. Note the word "have" and not "had" 'coz it'd be a lie to say that I've lost those fancies completely. I still do fancy her a lot. But now, after baring my heart in front of her, all I'm left with is an empty heart, a good feeling that I could be honest to someone and of course the wistful tears of having to wake up from a very beautiful dream. I'm not too sure whether she'd be comfortable in maintaining a contact with me after listening to all that I told her yesterday. But that's ok. I can understand her predicament. After all, she's one simple, straight forward ...