The Truth About Me-self

Hm...

2011-08-27T12:53:00.000-07:00

First of all, "Sorry" my friend that I couldn't give a happy note today - I'm too confused...

Me and my mom went for a late night show and we returned to find one of our kittens run over by some vehicle. It's intestines were our and it was taking its last. I scooped it up in my arms and walked a long way to find a decent place for it to be buried. While in my arms, it withed and showed signs of life! It opened it's tiny mouth and tried to cry out but its sound wouldn't come out. I was gripped by a sense of, I don't know what?

I deposited it by the road side where there was an overgrowth of shrubbery. I saw its dainty head resting on the grass. Did it look at me?

I couldn't stand it's pain. I thought I'd choke it to death to relieve it off its pains.

I tightened my fingers around its neck. Its neck was so tiny that just two of my fingers were enough to tighten my grip around it. I pressed. It didn't move. I pressed even harder and I saw a feet of it moving. I pressed even harder. Now I could feel it's little neck bone between my fingers. Its tiny limbs started beating in the air for breath under my mighty grip...

I just realised how tyrannical strength could be if not used in the proper way! I have always supported euthanasia. Now, I don't. Mercy or not, fate of another's life is not meant to be decided by us!

A good thought before I hit the bed

2011-08-25T12:00:00.000-07:00

I'm continuing my series on good thoughts before hitting the bed.

Not that anything so good happened today. It was a usual day - a hectic day, in fact. Lots of work, little chit-chats with colleagues and a beer to give a finishing touch to it all. To be frank, I'm just sitting bored, not knowing what exactly to do.

But as my friend suggested, I'm trying to keep the bad thoughts at bay and bidding all good thoughts, if any, to my mind.

What did happen today?

Got up early, took bath, had my breakfast and headed off to work.

But yes. There is something worth mentioning.

I had a late lunch, at about half past two. I felt very hungry and ran into the pantry of our office with my lunch box carefully packed by my mom. And what did I find in the box?

Aha! Nice vegetable biryani and fish curry and pappadams and a boiled egg! Also I had taste-buds-tickling lemon pickle in the shelf of the pantry? What more can a hungry tummy ask for?

Can you believe it if I say I blushed at the very aroma of the dish?

There was only our maid at the pantry and she couldn't help commenting on the expression on my face? She said: "Never seen someone smiling at food like that!"

And mind you, I'm not a foodie by any standards. I don't know the names of half the dishes I devour.

Nevertheless, I must say, I had a most perfect lunch - all the almonds, the spicy fish curry, the dried grapes, the bitter-sweet pickle and the crispy pappadams. To top it all was the potato fry. Oh... The taste still linger in my tongue.

I couldn't eat up all the potato fry 'coz my tummy was already full. And just as when I was about to feed the cats with the left over, came in a colleague of mine. The poor (metaphorically) girl lives in a hostel and she buys food from nearby restaurants everyday.

"Do you like potato fries? I've a few left and if you don't want it, I'm going to throw it away."

"Potato fries? Wow? Let me taste it."

And I handed over whatever was left with me. She took out one piece, held it between her fingers, parted her lips and gently took it closer to her taste buds.

"Wow. Yummy. I'll take it," she said.

And when I came back to pack my box after washing my hands, she exclaimed: "Who cooks at your home?"

"My mom, of course!"

"I must say she's a pro in cooking."

I felt guilty at her remark because me-self and my sis has always thought our mom was the worst cook. We always felt she added more salt than required to the dishes she prepared so lovingly for us. We have always criticised her cooking. We always compared the dished prepared by our friend's mother to her's and commented that she was inferior to them all. Little did we realise that it's just the change in taste that made those dishes more delicious.

More than that, I did blush at the aroma of her biryani!

I immediately felt an urge to call her. I hesitated not more than a second to take out my mobile phone and ring her up.

She picked up the call after a second try.

"Hello amma." (Hello mom)

"Entheda?" (What's up son?)

"The biryani was just wonderful. It was havenly. Thanks a lot amma."

She was silent for a moment. Maybe it was overwhelming to have got a compliment from me who have only criticised her since God-knows-when?

"But it was not that good. The rice was a little sticky," she said.

"Who cares! It tasted absolutely wonderful. I've never tasted a better biryani. And the potato fries... They were just perfect. You know, a colleague of mine who tasted it said the same."

She was silent again. Maybe she never expected that. After all, a mother, cooking for her children, has always been a thankless servant. And I just thought how thankless I must be to complain that a sub-editor's job in a news media is thankless! After all, I get paid for that thankless job and also, I get to learn a lot being at the desk, editing one article after another - at least I could improve my language. And what would have my mom, or anyone's mom, benefited from cooking for their children and husband?

I felt I owed a "Thanks" to her and I can bet she felt overwhelmed with happiness at such a trivial jester of mine.

And a couple of hours back, when we were sitting and talking about a lot of other issues, she interrupted me and asked: "Did you really mean what you said?"

"What?"

"About the biryani?"

"Absolutely. It was really wonderful. I'm only ashamed that it took another person to tell me what a wonderful cook you were."

She smiled and at that moment I knew she has forgiven me for all the pains I've ever caused her.

I kept her engaged in worldly talks until she stretched on her bed to sleep. I got up, switched off the light in her room with her permission and came out.

I wished I could give her a good-night kiss. But we are never used to such expressions and I left it at that.

I know her smile has not yet waned. I know she'd have a happy night's sleep.

What more can I ask for?

For the first time in my life, I made her smile, I could make her feel happy...

And I'm happy too...

A happy note for a friend

2011-08-24T09:41:00.000-07:00

I had this conversation with a friend two nights back and she insisted that I must continue blogging. Not just that, she also insisted that I must fill my blog with happier thoughts and the fun people around. Thank you friend, for pushing me in the right direction but I don't know how regular I can blog.

There used to be a time when I was like a-blog-post-a-day keeps Ekan happy. It's no longer like that. Nevertheless, I'll try to keep my promise to you.

To be frank, I didn't feel too good today. For some reason, I was a lot disturbed and I still am. The past three days had been good - fun filled and full of activities - but today...

Now, what was the sunnier side of my life today? Hm...

Ye! i thought of taking my mom out for a night-show. We wanted to watch a Tamil horror movie that got released recently. We had an early dinner and reached the cinema only to find out that the movie is no longer running there. Then we went around almost all the cinemas in town and couldn't find an interesting watch. We didn't know what to do? The night was still young and we had already finished off all the household chores. So i suggested a short drive around the town and the good sport that my mom is, she agreed. It was a good ride. I've taken my friends and g'friends and even my sister for such rides in the night but never my mom. It was a new experience - something to cherish!

Thank you mom!

Decided to live single

2011-08-01T22:02:00.000-07:00

There's a ton of memory that's weighing down my thoughts. I lost all my contact with her about 3 months back. I last send a mail and a message to her about two months back and never got any reply. No. Not that she'd dead. She's very much alive and I know that but she has gone far, far away from me. Not a day pass without thinking about her. In fact, it's her thoughts and the handful of beautiful memories of our togetherness that I live on every hour. I wish to go to her home, knock at her door and bargain a glance at her but I dare not do it. Not because I'm afraid of anything for myself but I don't wish to disrupt a peaceful life that I expect her to be having now. I think I've grown enough to take in pains and not complain aloud and so I sit here typing this post with invisible tears running down my cheeks. I wish someday I come across her again. No. Not to ask her anything. Not to hurt her with a word but to see her again. Just to see her again.

I see no more lights in her window when I pass her house in the evenings when I return home after office. Maybe they have moved out to a different house. I don't know. I don't wish to find that out either.

I want to but don't want to quit smoking. I know it's killing me with every drag I take in. The doctor diagnosed me with wheezing and advised me to quit smoking. Said I may develop asthma if I don't. My mom is sad that I'm killing myself. What I do now is smoke in secrecy and not hurt my mom. She's doubtful 'coz I still cough but I say it's 'coz of something else. I want to keep her happy but don't want to keep myself happy if I don't have her to share it with. Death doesn't scare me. As long as I'm alive, I'm not dead and when I'm dead, I wouldn't be there to regret it. I don't wish to live for long without her but I don't want to announce it aloud either. I don't want to commit suicide 'coz I'm scared of ending it all too soon - what if I get to see her one of these days? I don't want to deny me-self that chance.

Am I a Devdas? Not exactly. I don't drink myself to death. Nor am I sitting duck and doing nothing. I'm employed and I wish to give my 100 % in my job. I want to keep earning as long as my mom is alive 'coz I don't want to put her back to misery. She should be happy and yes - that's my only wish - that I stay alive as long as my mom is so that she's not left alone in this world. What after that? Ideally speaking, I want to die the next day after I finish off all the last rights for my mom. 'coz I no longer have a reason to live after that. My life has been compromised for love not once but twice and I failed. I'm carrying all the bitterness and pain of it with me through every living second.

My friends advised me to get married. I registered myself in a matrimonial site as I don't have the courage or energy to fall in love again. And now my hobby is to keep looking at all those pretty faces that come into my mail box everyday. I do find some of them suitable and attractive but I think my mind has lost the innocence to like another girl for her face value. I can keep looking at their faces, admire their beauty but the moment I think about a life with any one of them, the face of my girl springs back to my mind. I want any strange girl to be her. That is to say, I want her back and that's the only girl I can live with. Also, I refuse to believe that any other girl could be so warm and nice to me like she was and I'm not ready to compromise for anything less than that.

Today, on my way to office I was thinking why I can't live a single's life. Why not? I'm 28 now and I've been living single so far. Going ahead, I may live up to 55 or 60, which means half my life is already over. If I can make it alone this far, why make a fuss of making it till the end alone? And then again, I smoke, I drink, have no healthy habits, no proper exercise and live in a very polluted environment and chances are that my life will get further reduced. Then why the fuss at all? I don't know... Maybe it's just my human instinct to survive. But I fail to understand any logical reason behind survival. If you can do all you wished to do in a short time and die, isn't that enough? Me getting married or producing children is not going to affect the way the world is. Even if I refuse to produce a child, it's not a threat to the existence of human race. If I like kids, I can always have one or the other to play with 'coz the rest around me firmly believe in the idea of pro-generation.

I think now I've enough reasons to live and end (not on my own will, though) a short, lonely life...

If I don't sound logical in these ramblings, I'm MAD. I don't care either...

The Journey (Not a short story)

2011-05-20T02:08:00.000-07:00

Hi all,

Thought it's high time I returned where I belong. I've kept away from nearly everything for long and I guess, it has not done me good. Hm... Anyways, here I'm - back again in Blogosphere. I wonder how many of my friends remember me and how many I can catch up with.

I started writing this as a short story but towards the end I realised that it has too much of a personal and biographical touch to it. So, instead of posting it in my creative writing blog, I thought it's best posted here. This pretty much tells you what kept me away from all of you.

*********************************************

The bus rolled down to a halt at one of the many bends of the Ghats. The scene outside my window is one of those breath taking ones – the deep green slope that runs down into even greener plains, the distant blue trickle of a stream, the birds hovering a few feet below me, the myriad hues of the evening sky, the scattered clouds, the blushing orange sun standing half veiled by the horizon…

I don’t remember when I began this journey. I didn’t even begin this journey with my knowledge. As long as I remember, I’ve been sitting at this window seat, right behind the driver, seeing one scene changing after another. Sometimes the ride was a sail along golden paddy fields and lovely streams, and at other times, along bumpy mountainous terrains… All I know is that I’ve been in this journey for long.

And the driver… Oh! How I hate him.

He smells bad like a rotten corp. He is bulky like an overfed walrus, his fat arse spilling over his seat. He is dark like a panther. He has blood-shot eyes and dirty, unkempt and bushy mustache. He snores like a siren when he sleeps and yawns like a sick lion when he wakes up. Oh the smell when he yarns!

I’ve tried talking to him but he never listens. Sometimes I feel he is deaf but I know he is not. I haven’t seen him talking to anyone else either. He sits there, riding the bus through routes that suits his fancy and at times stopping for him to take rest.

Sometime, in between this long journey, someone had once told me that the driver’s name is Lionely Spervert, pronounced with the ‘i’ of the first name and ‘s’ of the second name silent. He had also told me that he is not someone to be messed around with.

Since then I’ve kept my guard, avoiding his bloody glares, swearing at him and cursing him under my breath.

There are times during the journey when I think about my destination. Where am I heading to? I’m not sure. Even the occasional friends who have shared the seat with me for a brief period never asked me. I always find them reaching their destination and bidding me good-bye. And then I never see them again.

Nevertheless, my journey continues…

So far, I’ve had three different and important people who have joined me in my journey but who have got down a little too early for my liking.

The first person was called Dad. I’ve never met a finer person than him. He was much elder to me but we struck a joyful rapport as if by some cosmic command. I still remember his pepper and salt, long beard and the endearing looks in his eyes. He used to entertain me with such lovely stories and songs. And he was a very soulful singer indeed. It’s not surprising that the songs that I still keep humming are the ones introduced to me by him.

I don’t remember him promising me that he’d be with me throughout the journey. No. I don’t think he did. Yet I always feel betrayed and cheated not by him but by the same ‘cosmic command’ whenever I think about the moment that he left me. And he left me even without a proper ‘good-bye’.

But I don’t have any hard feelings for him. I know he didn’t leave me on his own accord. He left me because he had to. He reached his destination and the rule of this journey doesn’t allow him to stay any longer. Probably that’s why he never stood to bid me farewell. Maybe it’s true that the best good-byes are said without saying the word.

Anyways, he has left his songs for me and I’ll keep humming them till the end.

The second person came long after he left. She is probably someone who I’ll never forget. Her name is Jasmine but with the smell of some wild flora, albeit an intoxicating one. She always reminds me of a blue-black moth in some deep woods. I don’t know whether she made herself that way but she was a tough nut to crack for herself. She was weird in many ways. Yet I took a fancy for her.

She came and sat beside me. Did I invite her? I don’t know. Maybe I did. Nevertheless, it was fun. She had many tricks up her sleeves. She charmed me with her (un) feminine ways. She kindled the photographer in me which I never knew existed. She shared with me an interest in nature but her lens always focused on the darker side when mine was hungry to capture all the colours and vibrancy of the same Mother Nature.

At some point in time, she promised me that she’ll be my constant companion through this journey, no matter where the destination is. I made the mistake of believing her.

Suddenly one day, I found her sitting with a stranger who got in from somewhere along the way. I called her back but she never returned. And then I saw them both getting down at some godforsaken place along the route. Were their destinations the same? Or did they get down to board another bus? I don’t know.

Then on, for some time I stopped noticing anything that happened outside my window. I didn’t notice all those who boarded or got down the bus. She took all my thoughts with her and left me empty. And so, with those empty eyes, I kept staring outside my window.

I don’t know how long I kept staring but something changed, somewhere, sometime…

Suddenly I found this third person sitting beside me. I’ve seen her before, sitting at the back seat with her parents. She has smiled at me whenever I looked at her. I don’t know when she walked down and took the seat beside me.

Now, this is someone I know I’ll miss for a lifetime just like I miss Dad because like him, she too had to leave me against her will.

Her name is Sweet. Yes. That’s how I’d like to call her because everything about her was nothing short of pure sweetness – her looks, her voice, her love for me… Yes. It was a sweet-sweet love I’ve ever had.

Talking about her smell, I can’t say whether she smelled of honey or milk. All I know is that it was a very sweet smell.

And just like Dad, she used to sing such beautiful songs. But unlike Dad’s, it’s her voice rather than the songs that I’ll carry along in this journey. But the thing that will remain etched in my memory will be the tears of agony that she held back when she was forced to say good-bye to me.

She said: “It hurts to part ways with you, it hurts me to hurt you but…”

And she got down where her parents had to get down. They never forced her to get down with them but neither did they let her stay back. I thought I could return her ‘good-bye’ without saying the word but I couldn’t. In fact, I uttered more words than I thought I should. I tried waving at her when the bus started moving again. But none of my words reached her. She didn’t see me waving at her, asking her to get back into the bus. She never looked back perhaps because it hurt her to see me getting hurt.

Tired with all the waving of hands and calling out to her, I slumped into my seat and drifted into a brief slumber.

Will I see her again? Will I hear from her again? I wish I do but I know I won’t for that’s the rule of this journey. And remember, Mr. Spervert is not someone to be messed around with.

I see that the sun has gone down. The sky, for most part is indigo and there’re patches of purple, orange and yellow where the growing night has devoured the day. The moon is already up with her battalion of twinkling stars to raid the night sky and an owl hooting out their arrival.

Mr. Spervert growled louder than the engine of the bus. I hear the shifting of gears now. The bus is about to move. My seemingly, unending journey continues...

Lost, found and lost again...

2011-05-07T17:33:00.000-07:00

It's an endless game, I suppose.

When I had my first break-up, I was determined never to fall in love again. And then I meet this angel of a girl who was more than willing to be my lady love. We got along and it was all fine except that her family was dead against it. I had no clue as to why anyone would say such a big 'NO' to our relationship. We ignored the obstacles and went ahead.

I don't know when but at some point in time, she started avoiding me. No. I'm sure it was not because she loved me any lesser. But she couldn't fight against all the odds at her home - the alienation, the frequent quarrels at home... and then her own anticipations about her career and future. I can see how trapped she must have felt. After all, she is a girl in this society and she has her LIMITS.

The reason for her family's objection to our relationship was something that still quiz my senses. As if like a ridiculous fate, even before we got along, they had a very bad opinion about me. They blamed me for all the wrong reasons. They over heard a fight I had with my first girl friend over the phone and I don't know how but they mistook me for calling my mom names! The only two people in this world I've ever sworn at are my maternal uncle and my first girl friend. And I don't regret it because they deserve to be sworn at.

And a second reason is something even more ridiculous. No, I don't wish to say what it is but know that it is the most bizarre thing anyone could have cooked up about me. I still have no clue as to how they conjured up all those opinions about me. I'm deeply hurt.

In spite of all this, I still kept a hope that she, who know the truths about me, will keep to my side. But... After a long silence, I had to call her for her to tell me that we have broken up! It was a real heart-breaking moment for me. I know, it is and has never been her fault. It's not her parent's fault either. It's a ridiculous fate that played the spoil sport.

Who can I blame for all this?

All I know is that my heart now bleeds. Unlike before, I don't freak out or get drunk... Maybe, it's my age that has made me a little more matured. Nevertheless, the pain is the same.

I long to hear her voice again. I long to set my eyes on her face again. She's a darling angel and no reasons will ever convince me about this loss.

.
.
.
.
.

I MISS HER. MISS HER VERY VERY MUCH!!

After a long, long while...

2010-09-22T22:23:00.000-07:00

I have been away from blogging for a long, long while now. I'm not back here to stay either. My life has been a mix of god and bad, as it always was.

When, on one side, I've gone a good way up in my career (I'm currently working as the Sub Editor for a web 2.0 based media house), my personal life has not been an easy one. The issue is the same - love-relationship. I hate myself to have fallen for a girl again. No. Not because she's bad. In fact, she's an angel. She's one of the finest girl, I've ever come across - full of love and compassion. But there lies the problem too. Her family thinks I'm a man with no morals or a character. This society that I'm living in, takes me for a loose, unreliable individual. And all this because I had a past relationship with a girl in which, I made a lot of mistakes and also because of my general attitude towards the norms and double-standard belief of the people around.

I mean, I react when parents keep two separate rules for a girl and a boy. They say falling in love is 'wrong' to their daughters and when it's their boy, it's 'kind'a ok' for them! What? Why? I ask these questions and I don't mince my words when I do that. Hence, the stamp on me that I'm someone with lose morals. Here, people talk about our children getting influenced by Western culture! But who buy them the latest laptops, wall mounting LCD TVs, mobile phones, internet connections so on and so forth? Are they still wearing the good old hand woven cotton clothes alone? No. A cultural influence from the West is indispensable! Even the westerners are taking to Yoga and Ayurveda. It's us who don't value it and still keep believing that they are all products of myth! Ok, ok...Let me not blabber too much.

I'm here to tell you all that I'm a broken man again. And this time, it's not the girl who cheated on me or anything. But my good old, conservative, traditional society has given me the seal of a 'bad, irresponsible individual' and snatched away a girl whom I love with all my heart.

I wouldn't say, I can't bear this pain. I can. I can... I can bear the pain of parting. But the reason for them snatching her away from me is something I can never accept or ever forgive anyone for. Her parents blame me for something I never did.

Feel like crying my heart out. Feel like banging my head on the wall. Feel like... Maybe just die!

Happy News, Happy-Happy News!!

2010-06-03T08:53:00.000-07:00

As I've told you earlier, I got into a website as a Sub Editor. I joined on the 1st of June. 3 days into my new job and I've two of my stories up in the site. Isn't this a moment to rejoice? To get published was a dream that I've been cherishing since a long, long time. And it's happening now.

I request you to pay a visit to our site and get back to me with your valuable feed backs. The link to the site is - www.yentha.com

Also, the links to my stories are -

A Boat Club With A Difference - www.yentha.com/news/view/4/559

&

The Age Of The Screenagers - www.yentha.com/news/view/3/530

There are more interesting stuff in our site for people who would like to know more about my city - Trivandrum.

Do visit the site, friends.

A few handi-works

2010-05-29T09:05:00.000-07:00

When I was still in school, I had a great liking for handicrafts. It used to be my favourite pass-time to make different stuff which are not more than a decorative piece or at times, something that serves a purpose. For some reason I didn't continue doing it. But when 'she' heard about this from me, she encouraged me, persuaded me and even forced me to try my hand at a forgotten art that I used to follow so religiously almost 12 years back. With much reluctance, as I was not sure whether I still remembered how to do all that, I agreed to try making some stuff. I couldn't start off immediately as I was not too confident with my hands anymore when it comes to subtle creations. But her persistence got the better of my reluctance and I sat down to make a wall hanging for her.

Now this is a simple thing to make with a couple of sticks and woolen yarn! Tell me, how it is?

This is the first one I made for a trial.

I got the hang of it and made this one for my girl.

But I couldn't stop there. I had to make her something more and I made this one for her.

Any guess what it is?

Well take a look at this...

Sorry. No prize for guessing it.

I made this one using a coconut shell. I scrapped away the fiber on it, polished it using sand paper and used acrylic paint on it. Later I gave it a varnish coating to make it look a bit glossy.

So, tell me friends, are they good ones? Were they a good gift for my girl? I guess so...

My dear girl, Tasha

2010-05-28T03:47:00.000-07:00

I took a few pics. of my lovely little girl. Tell me, isn't she cute?

"Aye-ye Commander!!!"

"Come on girl, let's go out and play. But where's your toy? Think Granny's hiding it."

"Don't worry. I'll get it from her."

"Ah! I'll murder this too."

"Ok. Now, what shall I do with this?"

"Just sit there and pose for a good snap."

" Hm... Ok!"

"Good. Now, let me get a close up of you."

"How close do you want to get?"

"And here's one more for you. Make that a good one, ok?"

"OMG! Just go away... Leave me alone. Can't you see how tired I'm?"

Best Blog Buddy Award

2010-05-26T05:02:00.000-07:00

I always complain that virtual friends are not just enough to sustain a social life. While I might be true in what I say, I must confess that it's only my virtual friends that I met in Blogosphere who were a reason that I'm still sane. My life, as I observe, has been a roller-coaster ride so far. The most unexpected things happen at the most unexpected time. I get a job I've been dreaming of one day and the next day the word goes around that I'm a mother f#{k@r. Sometimes, I find it too difficult to keep pace with the events in my life. Sometimes it's too tiring and all I want to do is just shrug off everything, take a break and go on a bike ride to free my spirit. And I've been writing about all these in my various blogs. If not for the Blogosphere, I would've continued feeling unwanted, unheard and hurt when some of the most important people in my life turned against me, when my friends deserted me over the most unreasonable things.

Here, I've found new friends, started reading about the life that different people lead in other corners of this world. It came as a great comfort to me to know that I'm not the only person in this world who had to go through all the hardships of life. Their entries about the events in their life have opened my eyes to a larger world. And some of you have stuck to me through my thick and thin, reassuring me that things'll get better when I felt down and cheering me when I was in my good spirits. You, my faceless friends, people whom I've never met before or known personally gave me the strength to move on... And so here I'm, giving out an award honouring the friendship that some of you have extended to me. You've been great people teaching me simple but effective lessons in life to forgive, to express me-self, to move on...

Here're my picks:

Steven Anthony @ Life in the Fish Bowl
Brian @ WaystationOne
Cathy Clementz @ Yooper Yarns
Betty Manousos @ Cut and Dry
Kaiserin Sisi @ Ramblings of a Hotelier's Wife
Lena @ What Lena Leaves
Otin @ Wizard of Otin
Shadow @ 1 door away from haven

They have been friends who took the pain to visit my blog even when I was not responding to their comments or giving them a visit in return. I thank them for their companionship and for understanding me. All these people maintain great blogs and some of them have more than one blog under his/her hood. Please pay them a visit.

And here's the award:

********************************

This is a no rule award. You can pass it over to any number of friends you want. And you needn't satisfy any condition except that you have been a good friend to receive this award.

Uh... Uh!!!

2010-05-25T03:23:00.000-07:00

I feel like a soldier in the war front but without any armour or a good weapon. And the people standing against me are not strictly my enemies. They're all just the victims of a ridiculous fate. Misunderstandings, suspicions... And all this while I was not even aware of what exactly I was betting against. All of a sudden, I saw people turning against me and spreading tales about me. And some of the tales were... Uh! Can't comprehend with all that's happening around me. I wouldn't have given it all a tither only if... Uh! Uh! Not that I can do anything about it now. But I'm going to loose my dear love for things I never did. Fate or whatever, this is not just or fair. I feel like a naive kid sitting and complaining like this. But what else can I do? Not that I can't react. But my age, my experiences and all have taught me that reacting or being aggressive is all the work of a weak mind. And I've grown stronger through the years. But there are times I curse me-self for being so considerate and calm even when the other person is slinging not mud but s#!t on me. And all I do is smile back at him, wipe off the dirt from my face, go back home, get into my room and hit the wall! That's how I vent out my anger, my frustration... Am I doing the right thing? I feel like running around mad and crying out to this whole world that I'm innocent of whatever the others are accusing me for. No. I never did that. I could never have done anything as disgusting as that! Call me any names. Brand me the way you please... But please... This is ridiculous. This is insane!! I do not mind me being convicted for a thing I never did. But loosing my love in the name of that is unbearable. It's way too painful for me that I've gone numb. I don't feel no more pain now. I can walk past a gory accident and smirk at the dead bodies. I'm becoming cynical without my knowledge. I'm loosing things for no fault of mine... OMG! When will I ever breath fresh again? Seems as if life's mocking at me!

PST: I'm sorry for such a bad post. I can't get it off my system. And I can't help but be very vague about the incidents. It's not my life I care for. But it'd put many people in the bad light if I start washing my dirty linens in the public and I don't want to do that. All I know is that life's playing yet another dirty trick with me.

Sunday Syndrome

2010-05-23T06:06:00.000-07:00

Sundays are always different, isn't it? I mean, have you felt it that way? We may have been home bound on other days too. But Sundays are always different - they're laid back. People wakeup late. It's like even the inanimate things in your house like your writing desk, the flowers outside your window and even your bathroom knows this! I got up today morning to find the plants outside my window drenched in yesterday night's rain, all looking sleepy. Mind you, the time was half past 8.

Then it was my bike. It wouldn't start at the first stroke of the kicker. And even after it got started, it started grumbling that I give it no rest! Surprisingly I found even my watch lagging behind in time. Now, can you believe that? I thought the battery had gone weak but not. I corrected the time and it's running alright now. I mean, I'm surprised at this whole thing!

I stepped into my bathroom to brush my teeth but the water wouldn't flow out of the tap before some gurgling and spitting. It seemed like I woke up the tap from a deep slumber and it was swearing at me. The only thing that was as alive and kicking around was my pet dog - Tasha. She was up and running around and climbing over me just like she would, any other day. She was waiting, as always, for me to open the door of my room and soon as I came out she came to play with me with the golf ball I gave her. But I couldn't shake out the Sunday syndrom out of me and I shooed her away. I feel bad about it now, though!

So, how was your Sunday?

Good News! Good News!!

2010-05-21T06:42:00.000-07:00

A second job half way through 2010 and with a slight increase in the salary too! But that's not the point here. I'm going to be the Sub Editor of a website! Now, isn't that wonderful? It is. It indeed is!!!

The story goes that once when I was returning home from my office, I happened to meet an old acquaintance of mine. Just as we were having a casual conversation I asked where she was working and she said she's working as a reporter in yentha.com. A reporter for a website? Now, that sounded intriguing and I checked the site. She was right and she had written a lot of articles and even maintains a column in the site. I got interested and send in my resume to the site for the post of a Sub Editor. As luck would have it, they were in the look out for an experienced hand to look after the editorial section. Can't say I'm an expert in editing. But my experience as a Copy Editor and Copy Writer counts, right? The rest is history...

I'd be joining my new job on the 1st of June. My job would include editing the stories brought in by the reporters, conceptualising other clickable columns and stories, write my own articles... And the best part of it is that I can start getting published! That's something I've been dreaming off since a long, long time. Now, did you hear that? I'm going to write and get published too!!! Wow! Yahoooo!!!

Wish me good luck, friends!!!

Giant Dogs!!!

2010-05-19T00:48:00.000-07:00

Many of you might be aware of my interest in dogs. While surfing the internet the day before, I happened to stumble up on an article talking about the Giant Dog Breeds. I got interested and searched the net for more information. The results were fascinating. Until now, I was under the impression that the St. Bernard was the biggest dog breed. But I was wrong. The St. indeed is a massive breed but there are tough competitors for the laid back one. No wonder he always has that 'sad' look on his face!

Just for information - The world's heaviest and largest dog in known history is claimed to be a Saint Bernard named Benedictine, which measured 9 ft in length and weighed 162 kg (357 lbs), although an 1895 New York Times report mentions a St. Bernard named Major F. who was longer. Benedictine surpassed Zorba, the largest English mastiff on record, in both length and weight. Zorba measured 8 feet, 3 inches long and weighed 343 lb. - Courtesy: Wikipedia

Tallest Dog on the Planet!!!

Let's meet 'Giant Geroge', the world's tallest dog according to the Guinness World Records.

Standing at seven feet and three inches from head tail and weighing 245 pounds, he’s not just a Great Dane; he’s the ‘greatest’ Dane! Guinness World Records today announced that ‘Giant George’, a Great Dane from Tucson, Arizona, USA, owned by David Nasser, is the new Guinness World Records holder of the Tallest Dog title. The new ‘top dog’ measures 43 inches from paw to shoulder as verified by a Guinness World Records adjudicator who visited the dog after controversy surrounding his height required an in-person measurement. ‘Giant George’ inched out the previous record holder, Titan, by 0.75 inches to claim the crown.

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Now, let me show you the pics. of some of the biggest, largest and tallest dogs around the world. I can't identify the breed of all of them. Have mentioned the ones I could spot. I'd appreciate if you can help me with identifying the rest.

Great Dane

Irish Wolfhound

English Mastiff

Great Dane

Bull Mastiff

English Mastiff

I love these giant friends of man. Wish I could own one of them some day...

Seeking your attention...

2010-05-15T08:24:00.000-07:00

As some of you might have noticed, I'm not very regular in the Blogosphere as I used to be. But that's not true. I may not be doing a daily post. But I do keep my blogs updated. I maintain a series of blogs and when I'm not attending to this blog, I might be updating one of my other blogs. Hence I've never been out of circulation, per say! If you have found this blog interesting, my other blogs are equally interesting as well. As I said, I maintain a series of blogs viz. 7 (including this one) as listed below. I'd request you to visit my other blogs too (ie. if you're interested!).

I'll list out my other blogs below with a brief of what you'd find in there:

1. Creative Writing - I first started experimenting with creative writing back in 1998 when I was still in school. I didn't give it much attention to it then. Neither did anyone else. What was so much in me came out when I was doing the first year of Engineering degree which, I discontinued half way through my second year. All those mathematical theorems and equations made no sense to me. Instead I found beauty and meaning in life, sitting at the window of my hostel room and gazing out into stretch of barren land with sun-burnt shrubs, majestic trees with a green cap and the cattle moving around, sometimes falling dead tired on the ground under the extremely hot sun. The scene, I know, was nothing to inspire an artistic mind. But my imagination took wings on one of those nights under the star studded sky. I sat sleepless at the verandah of my hostel with a pen and paper in hand and I wrote my first short story. I couldn't wait for the sun to come up and... my friends liked were all applause for my story. It was a revelation to me. I knew what I was made for and I quit Engineering without hesitating much! I came back to my home town to do a B.A in English and took to writing as a profession. And here I'm, a Copy/Content writer and almost a year and a half into the profession.

Take a look at my Creative Writing (Short Stories & Poems) @ Just Gibberish...

2. Photography - Yet another passion of mine though I have never undergone a professional training in it. My first Camera was a point and shoot Kodak film camera. I bought it with my piggy bank savings when I was in my high school. I tried experimenting with it but had to give it up soon owing to the expenses (film processing, new film rolls etc.) incurred by the equipment. I got my first digital camera - Canon Powershot A550 - back in 2007. It was my best purchase ever and I started experimenting with photography again, thanks to the guidance of my then girl friend who shared the same interest with me. Recently, I sold that camera too and am saving to buy a professional one.

Go through my Photography Experiments @ Shutterbug Clicking Away...

3. Travel - This is yet another passion of mine. The first long trip that I made all alone was kind of a pilgrimage when I was in my high school. I went around visiting some of the major temples in Kerala, changing one bus after the other and spending my nights in the bus to my next destination. It was a two day trip and I'd cherish it forever. But my real travel expeditions started when I got my first scooter. I must have been utter crazy to have made those 300-400 km + trips on a low powered typical urban machine (the one shown aside). But my passion for long rides got the better of me and I must say, I enjoyed every kilometre of my rides! I now own a more powerful bike and am waiting to make other long trips if and when I get a break from my highly demanding job!

Read about my travel expeditions @ Where The Roads Take Me

4. Music - Both me-self and my sister owe our talent in singing to our Dad. He was a great singer (not a professional though he once maintained a music band of his own). None of us are professional singers, for a matter of fact. My sister is an Engineer, my dad was a doctor and I needn't tell what my profession is, need I? But we all sing quite well and have won prizes in many competitions too.

Listen to me Singing @ Ekan Learns to Sing...

5. Creative Ads - And that's my job - writing creative copies for advertisements. I wouldn't claim that I've mastered the art. Brevity is not one of my virtues and hence, for me to say a message in a few words is like attempting to condense the whole of an epic in a single line! But I've managed to pull off a few stunts.

Checkout my creative ads @ Ekan's Creative Catalogue

6. Stories from Mythology - Last but not the least, this is a blog where I post all those beautiful stories from the Indian Mythology that my dad used to tell me and my sis when we were kids. Not all the stories are a reproduction of what I heard more than 15 years back. I definitely do refer to some texts and online to get the whole story. Never the less, it's an interesting read if you are someone interested in Indian (or more precisely) Hindu Mythology.

Indulge in Indian mythical tales @ Myths, tales and more...

So, there you're... I've given you the links for all my blogs. I request again, to people who'd be interested, to pay my other blogs a visit.

My new Short Story

2010-05-10T23:04:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to write a story based on a small event in my life. Can't say it's any event. Rather a little observation that I made when I was travelling in a bus. It happened back in the early 2007 and since then I've been trying to weave a story around it. I found an old man sitting near me in the bus doing something very odd (it appeared "odd" to me then!). Since then I've been thinking how I can make a story out of it. And after 3 years I knew what to write.

So here it is:

Old Man's Glasses (Click on the title/link)

My very first blog post!

2010-04-25T22:07:00.000-07:00

Now, that sounds funny, right? Actually I was made a part of a blog game by a dear blog friend, Nikita @ Infinite Emotions. The game is about re-posting your first blog and let the readers find out how far I have changed in person, in my thoughts etc. since my first post. Also I'll have to tag 5 of my blog friends and request them to carry forward the game. Sounds interesting.

Hm... First thing first. The five people I'd like to tag would be:

Steven Anthony @ No Excuse, No Explanation
Brian Miller @ Waystationone
Betty @ Cut and Dry
Meenakshi @ Banter Battery
Too Many Heart Beats @ Too Many Heart Beats

I chose these people in random. If anyone feels they have been ignored, I apologize.

Now, here's my first post:

Monday, June 29, 2009
"Oh my..."
It isn’t often that you walk into a place, look into a person’s eyes (just like that) and say "Oh my…". And yes that’s exactly what I said when I first saw her. Did I fall in love again? It seems like that and that’s what I blurted out to her. Since my heart wrenching break-up a year back, I’ve come across many a girls who made my heart miss a beat or two. But this time it’s different. If you ask me how, I’m afraid I don’t have an answer to that. I just know that it’s different this time. Do I fancy her? Oh yes! Very much!! Do I love her? I’m not too sure. Besides, how can you say you love someone without knowing him or her? But I'm sure I can love her and keep loving her for an eternity once I'm sure she is the one I was looking for. Did I "fall in love"? Absolutely, yes! I FELL for her, right on my nose and ever since I’ve not been able to breathe easily when she’s around. My lungs seem to need more air and at times my pulse go weaker. I'd say, this pretty little thing just stole my heart away. "Away". That's exactly how it is. She's away, far away from me. She left me all sick and all...

Do I want her to feel all the same? Of course. I’m a mere mortal!

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Now, now, I know that was a real mushy post! And anyone who has been following me would know whether I've changed or not!

Well, have I?

Surviving on a daily dose of ABBA

2010-04-21T05:52:00.000-07:00

Life's getting difficult. Can't complain though. There's a real stress on the work front and that too for the most ridiculous reasons. Can't understand people taking on personalities in an official atmosphere. You can always say that someone didn't do his/her job to the level of satisfaction expected of him/her. But to call names? Now, that is thoroughly unprofessional, isn't it? And the only thing that keeps me sane is ABBA. They, I believe, are good company for a stressed out soul like me.

The good old peppy numbers like "Mama Mia...", "Money, Money, Money...", "Gimme, Gimme, Gimme..." keeps me not just sane but happy too. These are times when I realise the importance of music and pets in one's life. If not for Tash (my cute little she pup) and the songs that I keep listening to day in and day out, I wouldn't have been sitting here and keying in the words in this post but would have been in some mental asylum. And who else than my Dad for me to thank for my taste in music! "Thank you Dad" (if you can ever hear me say it!).

It was him who first made me listen to the ever green classics of Jim Reeves, Carpenters, BONYM etc. But a special thanks to ABBA for keeping me sane in this mad, mad world! "Thank you for the music..."

"... miles to go before I sleep; And miles to go before I sleep."

2010-04-16T06:52:00.000-07:00

Ah! It's difficult to keep in touch with you all without the system at my home. Now, did I tell you that I sold my old computer? I guess not.

And yes. That's the latest update from me. Since the past couple of months, I got into this exercise of cutting short my expenses so as to save some money and payoff my debts that has been pending for a while now. So, as a first step, I sold my computer which means I no longer have to pay any internet bills. It wasn't an easy thing to do 'coz internet surfing, blogging and on-line games were the only entertainment for this recently friendless me. I felt as if a part of my daily life had vanished! Unlike I expected of me-self, I got over that feeling pretty soon. I thought of investing my time in reading and photography but in vain. My camera got damaged in a minor accident that I met with on my bike. Though nothing happened to me, my camera got severely damaged. I took it to a service centre and they gave a whooping estimate for the repair. And so, I sold my camera too. But that was a real lose. I can do without a computer and the internet. At least I could get into an internet cafe if I'm so desperate for it. Besides, I can access my personal mails and stuff at my office itself. But loosing my camera... Oh! I feel so handicapped! But wait, I've better plans!! I'm gon'a save money and buy a professional camera. Though it'll take me some time, it's worth the wait and hard work! I've my eyes on the following two models:

Canon EOS 1000D

Nikon D90

Any suggestions as to which one would be a better one for an amateur like me?

Also, there are other things happening in my life which are keeping me away from you people. I got a chance to see the real side of the ones whom I considered my best buddies. Frankly, more than hurting me, it repulsed me. How could people be such hypocrites? Let whatever their "good intentions" be, the way they made me a subject of such distasteful tales was nothing short of sheer atrocity! Now, I don't wish to get into any details of this. Let my dirty linens be washed in my privacy.

In spite of all these hard times, I'm a much happier and worthier person than what I used to be. Maybe that my hard times did teach me a lesson or two! I still have things to do before I can even think of giving me-self a break or rest - "... miles to go before I sleep; And miles to go before I sleep" (Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost).

It is so said that there's a woman behind every man's success. I do not know how true it is! 'coz it was a girl who was more or less responsible for the downfall in my past and it's again a girl, who just pulled me up a deep dungeon of despair. Her mere presence in my life is making me experience things that I longed for... Ok. Ok. It's better that I stop here...

Happy News! Happy-Happy News!!

2010-04-02T23:47:00.000-07:00

I won a weekly Photography Contest conducted by The Hindu, a main line News Daily in my town. And here's the prize winning pic. titled 'Balancing Act'.

YAHOO!!!

Ekan returns to Blogoshpere!

2010-04-01T01:21:00.000-07:00

Ah! After a long, long time! Many of you might have forgotten me. But a special Thanks to Steven Anthony, Brian Miller, Betty, Meenakshi, Ocean Girl, Dean and Lena who even in my absence and irregular appearances, followed me through never the less. These people made me feel that I'm really missed in the wonderful Blogosphere. THANK YOU ALL, THANKS A LOT!!!

A lot of water has passed under the bridge since I last sat down to write about a few 'Truths" about "Me-self". My life has taken an entirely different curve. So much to tell you all...

Let me start with my job. Some of you might have read one of my previous posts wherein I talked about getting into a new Advertising Agency as a Copy Writer. My job's going well. I'm the one and only Copy Writer in this firm and I'm shocked at the amount of work I'm capable of handling. I did about 5 print ads, a few news letters and odd works at my previous company and I was doing a lousy job. And when it was time of my review, my boss said he was not happy with my work. Eventually I had to resign to preserve my dignity. My moral was hitting the (-) scales and I went about trying for other jobs. I was not confident to take up the job of a Copy Writer which I loved but was not able to handle efficiently. I then got a call from this company and my new boss said I'll have to start working on assignments from day one. I was scared but I agreed. Surprise! Surprise!! I could do it. And with the number of assignments pouring in every day, I never had the time to feel under-confident or anything. And the result - In 2 months in this company, I completed almost three times the amount of work that I did in 6 months in my previous company. Do check out my new blog showcasing my works - Ekan's Creative Catalogue (Click on the title).

Hm! Now to talk about my Love Life... I better not say anything much about it. I don't think I'm someone lucky enough in that department. No. This time the girl didn't cheat me or hurt me. It's my pennilessness that's keeping us apart. All I need is time and I'm trying hard to buy just that. Will I succeed? Just wait and watch!

Tasha (my 10 months old black-she-labrador) has grown taller! She reaches up to my chest when she stands on her two hind legs. Now, does that sound scary or cute? It's more than a cute thing for me! And my God! The little girl has the appetite of an Alligator, I guess! And the next most fascinating news is that she has fond a friend in a little-tiny-winy frog. I don't know from where, but since the last one month or so, there comes a little frog visiting Tasha every evening when the clock strikes 7 and she carries it around in her mouth and plops it down wherever she please. The froggy then starts hopping around for a while with her chasing it and it disappears after a while only to visit her the next day! Now, isn't that an amazing thing to happen?

Well, folks, there are still more things to say but let me not talk too much.

Keep in touch and I'll try not to go out of circulation again.

And finally, THANKS once again for your visits and comments on my posts even when I was away!

New Blog Introduced

2010-03-02T03:07:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone,

Some of you might be aware of the fact that I've been working as a Copy Writer with Advertising Agencies for a while now. I've now started a new blog cataloging all the creative works I've done so far. I seek your attention to that blog and request you to leave your valuable comments there. Your comments and criticisms will go a long way in making me better in my job.

Click on the following for the link to my new blog - Creative Catalogue

I'd love you as much as I love some sleep!

2010-02-13T00:08:00.000-08:00

I'm typing this sitting in my office. Am I allowed to? Not exactly. But I can do it if I don't have any other work to do. But, do I have any other work to do? Yes, of course. A branding assignment for a car-audio accessory shop is hanging heavy over my head. But I'm not able to concentrate. And why? 'coz my head is feeling too heavy and there is flame in my eyes and I'm longing for that deep, dreamless sleep.

Ye! It goes like this. Yesterday was Mahashivrathri (I'll talk about it in my other blog - Myths, Tales & More), a Hindu festival and you need to (not mandatory, though) stay awake the whole night and can welcome sleep only after the first star makes an appearance on the indigo sky. Me-self, along with a couple of my cousins and an uncle went on a tour of many Shiva temples in and around my city. We started driving at 8 p.m yesterday and returned home at 6 a.m today morning. Staying awake on the move was not a tough thing for me. But once I returned to the cozy comfort of my room, my eyes started to get heavier and heavier. I tried listening to music to stay awake. It didn't work. So I started scribbling in my diary. A few minutes into that exercise, I caught my hands wandering all over the page and instead of any writings, there were lines criss-crossed all over the page. I stopped that too. In my desperateness to stay awake, I next turned to my bed (Now, wasn't that the last thing I shuld've done? Funny me!)! I saw a Perry Mason lying at the edge of my bed and I sat down to read (and that too, to stay awake!). Flipping through the pages, I automatically leaned on to my pillow and the rest is history! You can guess what would've happened!

Well I had to wake up in an hour 'coz it was getting late for my office. And here I'm sitting at my desk, staring at the inanimate screen of my computer and scribbling what I couldn't a few hours back. God, save me!

I've never loved and longed for sleep before. EVER!!! Ah! But this is a trial. Look at how perfectly I'm going to stay awake and chanting the next year on the same occasion.

Wish me "Good Luck" guys. I really, really need it!

The Road Not Taken

2010-02-08T01:57:00.000-08:00

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim

Because it was grassy and wanted wear,

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I marked the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

'The Road Not Taken' by Robert Frost (American Poet, 1874-1963)

I think I first came across this poem when I was in 8th or 9th standard in school. I remember going back home and reading it again and again, trying to figure out the things written between the lines of this poem. I was a kid and yet this poem had a great impact on me in the way I started approaching things in life ever since then. I was no longer afraid to try out things in my own way. In fact, I was curious to experiment with my life and the need to achieve 'something different' if not great in my life started to grow in me. And so I dropped out of my Engineering Degree, three semesters through the course and pursued English Literature. My kiths and kins were aghast at my decision. What I was doing in their eyes was leaving a professional course that would have fetched me a good job and salary and taking to arts which did not promise me anything great, least secured. And here I'm, working as a Copy Writer with an Advertising Agency for one third of a salary that my other friends are earning now. Worst even, it's I who come from a weaker financial background than most of my other friends. But... Do I have any complaints? Absolutely not. Yet I'm bothered about the pittance of a salary that I draw at the end of each month and I keep looking at my pay-check for the numerals on it to change by some miracle. It never has (Obviously!). But it wouldn't be too long when I start earning my pocketful and I know that for a fact.

Did I make a wrong choice in my past? I don't think so. I was very conscious about my decision and I did anticipate my chosen path to wind and spiral just like in the poem - "Yet knowing how way leads on to way".

Past the 10k limit!

2010-01-28T20:32:00.000-08:00

It so happens that I applied for job in my home town after putting in applications in many a companies in the bigger cities. I never expected to get that job. But as luck would have it, they called me for an interview and yes... You guessed it right - I got that job. I got my second lease of life as a Copy Writer with an Advertising Agency. I know where I went wrong in my previous job and I'm sure I'd not repeat it again. I'm gon'a put my heart and soul in this and I AM going to come up with copies better than ever. I've promised to give it my best shot! Whether I'm good or bad at it, I'm going to be a Cop Writer. I've chosen my career path and that's it!

Better even, for the first time ever I'm placed as a permanent employee and not as a trainee. The best part of the story is that I got a job which pays me more than Rs. 10,000! Oh! How I longed to cross that mark! I was sick of that figure and when was I putting in my applications for a new job I was hoping against hopes that I'd be paid more than 10k. I was ready to fall at my employer's feet to make it at least Rs. 10,001! Also, I had my sleeves rolled up for a good stunt if anyone dared tell me that's all I'am worth! Can anyone imagine my frustration of being stuck in a baseline salary scale for the past two years? Well, it's pretty frustrating (FYI).

So, GOOD BYE 10k... GOOD BYE and I bet I'll never see you again!!!

This is ridiculuos!!!

2010-01-26T11:33:00.000-08:00

Yahooooooooo!!!

I got my bike back!!!

Yes! I got my bike back from the cops. But the whole drama was nothing short of ridiculous. For the ones who are not familiar with the story, let me begin from the beginning - It was 10.30 on the cold December night, the 5th 2008 and I started my bike for a ride to Coimbatore, 400 km away from my home town to meet my friends. It was a much awaited trip and I started the ride with great enthusiasm and much fun to look forward to. I rode through the chilling night to reach Coimbatore by around 9 in the morning. No sooner than I entered the city limit, the traffic cops stopped me. They asked me for my licence and when I produced it they asked me for the relevant papers to prove that the bike was mine. It was only then I realized that I lost it on the way!

I still remember that wicked grin on the cop's face when I told him that I didn't have the papers with me. I tried my best to convince them about my situation but they wouldn't listen. They ceased my vehicle and from then on it was a tough time for me. I traveled all the way up and down on almost every weekend to get my bike back. So much of money and time was wasted over the past few weekends and in vain. And finally I got my bike yesterday after bribing the cops with a petty Rs. 500 ($ 12.5)!!!

Is that all? Did they make me run around and waste so much of money for just Rs. 500??? I know it sounds very funny to say this but I would've felt better if they had asked me for more!

Now, isn't this ridiculous?

Thanks to the age old Ayurveda!!!

2010-01-19T23:43:00.000-08:00

Now, now, don't get scared! That's my Ayurvedic face mask to treat the marks left by chickenpox. I must admit that it's really working wonders. In a month's time those marks declared by doctors as incurable have vanished to a great degree. Can't say that my face looks the same. But it sure has improved a lot! Also the texture and complexion of my facial skin has improved - I feel it to be more supple and healthy.

The treatment goes like this - Apply and retain the mask, which is Rosewood powder mixed in Nalpamarathi Oil (No idea what this is called in English) for an hour and wash it off. Apply Kumkumathi Lepam (Vermilion paste) once your face has dried. Do this before your night's sleep so that you wouldn't have to wash off the Vermilion paste. You can wash your face with a mild face-wash in the morning.

Special note: Nalpamarathi Oil is a wonder medicine for almost all your skin problems. It really does improve one's complexion when used on a regular basis. It is also a wonder medicine for treating dandruff, dry scalp, scaly and chipped skin, wrinkles, dark circles under your eyes and many others. It is one of the most preferred baby oil and which is used to treat stretch marks and other skin problems after pregnancy. For young girls, if you wish to have that glowing, supple skin, there's nothing better than Nalpamarathi Oil.

And the best part of the story is that unlike other cosmetic treatments, you don't have to throw money over your head for particular brands and you need least worry about any side effects! What more? You can do it at your convenience and at your home. And that means - no worry about doctor's bills and no visit to any skin clinics!

Before (Taken a month and a half back)

After (Taken today)

Thanks to the age old Ayurveda!!!

Now, tell me folks - was I exaggerating one bit???

"Selfish", "Unconcerned" and a "Goon"

2010-01-18T09:45:00.000-08:00

Ye! Exactly. "Selfish" and "Unconcerned" are two new adjectives that people have found to describe me and "Goon" is my new designation.

All this started with me proposing to my best friend's sister. He's throughly against it and he made a big fuss over the whole thing. I thought he objected to the relationship because I was a penniless bastard. But no. He did call me a "bastard" though! But me being penniless is not his issue. It seems that I'm a very SELFISH and UNCONCERNED (also read as CARELESS) individual and that his sister would never be happy with me. Good enough! After all, he's a brother, right? But I'm hurt. So terribly hurt! I wonder what other things he would've talked about me at my back? And he was telling me that this relationship wouldn't work because his sister is too much of an emotional person for me to handle!

And the story behind me being a "Goon" goes like this - The same girl had a boy friend who was a big time sucker. She was suffering under him and she didn't know how to get out of it. So, I took it as my responsibility to help her out of that relationship. I counselled her out of it very systematically and finally she said her parting words to him. But he started acting crazy. He even went to the extent of stalling her at their office. When things seemed to be steering out of control, I went and met this guy and tried to reason out things with him. But 10 minutes into that conversation, I found him to be a very unstable mind. So I did the next best thing possible - warned him in a very mild way to be out of this girl's life. I asked him not to bother her too much unless he wanted the situation to worsen. And when this news about me having a meeting with her x-boyfriend reached her parents, they assumed that her brother send me to threaten the guy out of any mischief. And so, now I'm a "goon" for hire who goes around threatening boyfriend's causing trouble to their girlfriends!

I heard someone telling me that 2010 is going to be an eventful and great year for me. It obviously seems to be so!!!

Cops, Bike and my loss!

2010-01-14T21:17:00.000-08:00

Hm! Been away for a while now. And I doubt how much I can blog from now on. I'm planning to move to a new place with a new job and stuff. Not that I got a new job. I'm still on a job hunt. Things're not moving as I planned. As I mentioned in an earlier post, my motorcycle was ceased by the cops 'coz I didn't have the relevant papers to prove my ownership of the vehicle. The thing is that I lost it on my way on a long ride and the cops and officials are just having a good time screwing my happiness. I've been trying to get a duplicate of the papers from the authorities for about a month and odd. People are simply so unresponsive and heartless. My bike's at a police station about 400kms from my home and I've been traveling up and down almost every other weekend for a while now. I agree that driving my bike without the relevant papers was not right. But the attitude of the cops sucks big time. Each time I visit them, they ask me to produce some other document and when I go back with what they asked me for, they 'd just shrug their shoulder and say, "Ok. Now where is the other document?". I mean, what do they really want? Bribe? I'm ready to do that. But I really need my bike back. I brought it with my hard earned money and I'm still paying the monthly installment for a bike that I'm not riding anymore. OMG! What the hell is happening? Why is this world such a sucking place to live in? Why do they have to make someone's life so difficult? The latest update is that I again did my up-down trip yesterday. This time I had all the documents they asked me for but I still didn't get my bike back! Guess why? The officer who attended to me on the day my bike was caught is on leave!!!! Ridiculous!!!! Can you believe this? A cop on leave and no one to substitute him! The other f#@!ing men in uniform there said that they didn't know where to find the logbook in which the other gentleman entered the details of the arrest! And so, I'll have to travel all the 400kms again on Monday. I do not know what's going to happen on Monday. But I've decided to forget my bike for good if I can't get it back on Monday. I mean, there's a limit to which they can make me run around for something. And yes. That's it. I'd decide to loose that bike forver. Let them do whatever they want with it. I can't be bothered anymore!!

And that's my dear bike - Yamaha Gladiator

Oh! How much I miss you...

My 100th Post and pointless thought!

2009-12-30T06:29:00.000-08:00

This is my 100 th post and I had a different thing in my mind. But something that I read about (rather) forced me put down these pointless thoughts in my blog.

Today I stumbled on an online forum where people were writing reviews about their dear bikes. I was more than shocked to find out that Indian men still do not know to differentiate between a Sports Model and a Tourer/Cruiser. The bikes about which they were talking so loud were the Yamaha FZ 16, Hero Honda Karizma and Bajaj Pulsar (150/180/220cc). And they were fighting over which of these is the best Tourer Bike in the country. Now, before going into any further discussion on this topic, let me show you the pics. of these bikes:

Yamaha FZ (150cc)

Karizma (220cc)

Pulsar 180cc

Pulsar 220cc

Need I say more? Tourers? Cruisers? These bikes? Oh, come on! Give me a break. What do you think you're arguing about and that too in public forums? Just look at the design of those bikes! Do they look anything remotely designed for long rides? Well, you can use them for long rides if you want. I me-self do use such stupid machines for my biking expeditions. But never had I had the audacity to call them tourers/cruisers! They are meant to be urban street machines and nothing more. I wonder whether these men has ever set their eyes on a real tourer/cruiser bike. FYI, it looks like this:

Harley Davidson

Triumph

Yes! That's how a tourer/cruiser is supposed to look like and in India we have only the Royal Enfield who makes tourers/cruisers. Besides, a tourer/cruiser needs to have a powerful engine. Something above 250cc and that delivers a power of at the least 20bhp 'coz long rides are meant to be loooong rides and if your bike is not powerful enough you're going to have stiff backs, ankles, wrists and a bike which is going to break down after a while. And no bike manufacturers in India, except perhaps the Royal Enfield, makes a bike of that capacity as of now.

Royal Enfield 350cc Classic

Royal Enfield Thunderbird (350cc)

Some of the features that makes a tourer bike a Tourer Bike are:

Low raise seat for better seating position so that you do not strain your back on long rides.
Wide handles so that you do not strain your shoulders or wrists.
Wide tyres for better road grip.
Heavy body so that the aerodynamics is taken cared of when you're cruising along highways through open land.
Good ground clearance to conquer any kind of terrains.
Comfortable pillion seats (if you have a pillion, that is!)
Powerful engine.

Now, tell me, which of the Yamahas, Pulsars or the Hero Hondas are designed so? Can't you see that these are meant to be urban race bikes? What makes anyone call a Pulsar 220 a perfect tourer bike? Well, as I said before, you can use it for longer rides. But that doesn't make it a tourer bike, does it?

And, there was someone comparing the speeds of these supposed to be Cruisers! I mean... Look at the name - Cruiser. And a cruiser is supposed to be used to cruise along the long and rough terrains on a long ride, I suppose! Why should the top speed of a cruiser matter? Besides the bikes compared differ in their top speed not in any significant degrees (Pulsar 220 - 135km/hr, Yamaha FZ - 130 km/hr, Pulsar 180 - 128 km/hr, Karizma - 126 km/hr and Pulsar 150 - 115km/hr). Now, do I know anyone who 'cruises' at a speed more than 70km/hr or 80 km/hr? I mean, what's the whole point? Why do you want to race all the other bikes on the road if cruising is what you have in your mind? ...

Ah! What's the point of arguing? Not that I can put any sense in anyones head with this post. But I'm letting a bit of steam... I mean, why should men argue like kids in school? And that too, when they so totally miss out on the real point of argument!

Ekan's Celebrity New Year Gala (30+1 celebrities)

2009-12-22T09:10:00.000-08:00

Disclaimer: This is an out and out imaginative stuff and I'd be celebrating my New Year with Loneliness in the privacy of my room! Also, I picked this idea from my best blog buddy's post - Steven Anthony @ No Excuse, No Explanation.

Come New Year and it's time for the much awaited Ekan's Celebrity New Year Gala. I have grand plans for this new year and all are invited to join the party. Here's a list of my favourite celebrities from around the globe, whom I'd be inviting to the New Year Bash - 2010.

The first invite goes to none other than Ingrid Bergman. Ahm! I know, this one would have to go rather a long, long way to reach her. Non the less, I sure would love to have her for my party.

The other celebrities who'd grace the occasion are:

Sean Connery (Most stylish and elegant of all the men I've seen till date)

Catherine Zeta Jones (Sexiest lady on-screen. Ooohmp...)

Bobby McFerrin (What's a party without this guy? "Don't worry. Be happy...")

Amitabh Bachchan (The most popular actor in India)

Meg Ryan (She's the funniest woman I've seen on-screen. My party without her would be like a peg of whiskey without the ice!)

Shaan (One of the best singer's in India)

Loreena McKennitt (I'm in love with this lady for her voice)

Popeye and Olive Oil (They're the cutest couple ever)

Sir Vivian Richards (The veteran cricketer I admire the most - Team: West Indies)

Madhuri Dixit (The sexiest as well as the most beautiful woman in Indian movie)

Ilayaraja (The music Maestro. I grew up listening to songs made by this most gifted musician and believe me, I haven't heard anyone better than him yet)

Janaki (She's undoubtedly the singing legend in India. Haven't heard a female voice which could match up to her's!)

Harrison Ford (One of my fav. actor's)

Kajol (Another very beautiful, bubbly and a most talented actress from India)

Kate Winslet (I've a crush on this lady. Oh, come on! Who doesn't?)

Naseeruddin Shah (You might remember this very versatile Indian actor from 'The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen')

S.P. Balasubramaniam aka. S.P.B (He has been singing for ages now and sings just like he did, the first day! A Living Legend In Indian music arena)

Sachin Tendulkar ("If cricket is our religion, Sachin is our God!", says the cricket crazy Indians. Need I say more about this willow wielder?)

Shrek and Fiona (Another one of my fav. couples on-screen)

Shankar Mahadevan (Another one of the greatest contemporary singers from India)

Aamir Khan (One of the most versatile actors in India. Also, he's perhaps, the only superstar with brains. He chooses his roles carefully, which is very uncommon with other big actors in India)

Robin Williams (What's a party without this merry man?)

A.R. Rahman (World renowned Indian music director with an Academy Award (Slum dog Millionaire) to his credit.)

Tom Hanks (Now, does he need an introduction?)

Uma Thurman (Acclaimed as the most brainy among the Hollywood lead ladies and I can see that for sure!)

Road Runner and Coyote (They rank first in my fav. list. Such an adorable pair!!)

Sivamani (I'm speechless when it comes to this man. I mean, he's simply amazing. He creates beats out of... almost anything from table-tops to cups, empty can to your bald head!!!)

Dhum! Dhum! Dhum! Let's add a beat to the party!!!

So, folks... That's going to be my party. I've rolled the Red Carpet and send out the invitations. What more? I've made arrangements for the best dishes in town and cartons of beer and other drinks. But no party would be a party without you. Come... Join the bash and let's rock!!!

Hands up! - Cutest Kitty Video

2009-12-21T08:07:00.000-08:00

This is the cutest cat video I've ever seen. Take a look.

MERRY X'MAS!!!

Happy, happier, happiest...

2009-12-18T09:17:00.000-08:00

Yahoo! I got my pics. reviewed by a professional photographer and to my utter surprise he said among the set of 30 + pics. that I showed him, he really liked four. He said they are really, really good. Then I had a chat with him and he said I do have an eye for good photographs. He went on to tell me how I can get into the profession (that is, if I'm serious about it). I was overwhelmed when he picked on one pic. and said it was his favourite. Incidentally, the same pic. is my favourite too and I consider it my masterpiece. Wooo!!! Yei! Yei!! I couldn't have bargained for more!

Here are his picks:

Contemplation (My masterpiece)

Untitled (Suggestions welcome)

Call Of The Ancient

Moony

I do have more pics. which he has not seen yet. I'd be meeting him again for his reviews on those pics.

I'm over the top!!!

Yahooooooooo...

And many THANKS to my Creative Director for introducing me to him.

And here's the link to my photo blog for those who think it's worth a visit - Shutterbug clicking away...

Back in action

2009-12-17T10:31:00.000-08:00

Huh... poof!!!

I'm finally back after a long unprecedented break. Was caught up in a number of things that I me-self didn't realize just how much of water has flown under the bridge. I can't even sit and write about all that happened. Too many things to mention. So, let me just put it in points.

Proposed to my best friend's sister and I lost him for a friend.
The cops took away my bike from me 'coz I was fool enough to ride it without proper documents to show that it was my bike.
Applied for a loan 'coz I desperately needed to raise some money and failed.
My system had a temporary crash and got corrected by itself.
And finally, I lost my job!

Let me elucidate on that last point. Today my Creative Director called me for a one on one and said he's not interested in maintaining me at his firm. No. It was not as bad as it sounds. I was expecting this any moment and I'm relieved that it happened soon. At least I'm spared the tension of carrying this load in my mind. He said he still would like to help me out with a job and he sounded very genuine. I really appreciate his concern for me. He said he'll be introducing me to a professional photographer soon and suggested that I pursue photography as a career 'coz I seem to have a good eye for frames! Now, that's a compliment, indeed. But I haven't decided on anything. I thought I'd take a break, weigh my options and think about tings with a cool cool head. After all, life's been always fair to me and I shouldn't be complaining much!

Will be back with more updates soon.

Signing off for the day.

Ekan

Listen to me sing a song, anyhow!

Alliyambal kadavil... | Music Upload

Here's the link to my song blog for those of you who're interested: Ekan Learns To Sing... (Click on the link)

The Mean Kitty Song

2009-12-08T02:30:00.001-08:00

I found this in YouTube while I was browsing for random stuff. Take a look...

My strawberry pudding comes with bitter topping!

2009-12-06T23:30:00.000-08:00

Aha! Please excuse my very erratic blog conduct. I know I'm not too regular now-a-days. And somethings did happen in the past few days and I can't thank heaven more for all this! I can't say I'm in cloud 9. I'd rather say this is the first time I've ever felt my feet on ground. This sense of calm and steady mind... Ah! I've never experienced this for ages now. But as always is with my case, my sweet puddings always comes with bitter toppings!

The biggest news is that I've quit smoking. Now, can you believe that? I bet you can't and I know it appears to early to say so 'coz it's been only 5 days since I quit smoking! But believe me or not, I'm done with that ghastly habit for this life time. No. I do not "think" so, I've rather decided so. Also, I've started a 41 days vrithm (no non veg food, no cigarettes, no drinks etc. for these 41 days). Now, HOWZAT????

Wondering how all these changes in a matter of few days? All, I'd say is that "behind the success of every man, is a woman". And yes, there's one such women in my life now. Actually she's no women. A 21 year old can hardly be called a woman! But she's simply marvelous! She's not my lover, not my sister, not my cousin, no kith or kin. But in the few days that I started talking with her, she has become all this for me. And when she asked me to quit smoking, I didn't have to think twice before I took the decision! And here I'm... haven't touched a cigarette or any alcoholic beverage for the past 5 days. And even when I crave to death to take one drag, "just one last drag" of a cigarette, all I have to do is close my eyes, take in a deep breath and think about her and that's it. No temptation seems to be strong enough to bother me anymore. I just have to think about her innocent, smiling face and I can't do a wrong thing even if I tried.

But here's the sad part of the story - I did talk about my fondness for her to a friend of mine and he said it wouldn't be proper on my side to let her know about what's in my mind. He asked me not to take any solid step towards a relationship with her simply 'coz I'm in no position to afford a girl in my life, right now. He asked me to work my way up to her; to earn her and not just propose to her and mess up things. He's right. If she says a "No" to my proposal, it's ok. But if I propose her now and she says "yes"... that'd be a through catastrophe. I'll be left to fight another lone battle. Anyways, she's only 21 and have time enough in front of her. So, why not I give myself a couple of years to build my life and then ask for her hand to her dad? I think that's the best thing to do.

And so I thought and play it meticulously. But she got the wind of my attraction for her and she started probing me on the issue. I tried my best to duck it but was caught red handed when I blurted out that "I wouldn't mind what wedding gown she'd choose to wear for "our" wedding". I mean, I never meant to say anything like that. It just slipped out of my tongue and there... The rabbit is out of the bush, now. Even happier was the news that she too had her hots for me.

Now, does that make a sweet strawberry pudding? And here's the bitter topping for it. For the past three days, she has been eating my ears about how and what all I should be doing to make my life better for the both of us and stuff like that. Now, I do appreciate her better intentions but this is ridiculous! I didn't even propose to her formally and she's already taken full charge of me. I do not wish to hurt her but I'm afraid I might have to. I'm ready to listen to her but I don't want her to be at my back telling me things to do. This is not about any ego. It's just that it gets too exhausting and ridiculous to listen to advises day in and day out and that too from someone who is supposed to be your lover!

OMG! My dear 21 year old. You're "that" person in my life after two years after my break up and I look forward to a lot of fun and happening times with you. See, I've already stopped smoking, which I never did even after the best of my friends asked me to, just 'coz you requested me to stop it. Don't you think I take this relationship seriously? Don't you think I'd work towards building my life, now that I've found a reason to do just that. I will, I WILL... Sure I will. But please stop nagging me like an old granny!

This is just one of the troubles. There are others... like 'coz of her love for me, she wants me to stay focused on building my life and career and for that (it seems) that we need to stay apart for a couple of years and there needn't be even telephonic conversations! My God! I like her and it's true. But I hardly know her. How am I going to wait for a person without even knowing that person? How am I going to sustain a relationship without interacting with her? She says we can do that even after two years! MY GOOD LORD... Gr... Hm... Ok. So that's my strawberry pudding with some real bitter toppings. And the funnier part is that I still like to have the pudding!

Wait'n for X'mas

2009-11-29T20:46:00.000-08:00

Yet another X'mas in the offing and I see a lot of my friends talking about their elaborate preparations for a happy get together of families and friends. I'm not a Christian. I have never read the Bible except in parts. Yet, I've always loved the spirit of this season. I've seen it in many movies and read about it in many books. My first encounter with the spirit of X'mas was is my 8th standard English text book in school which had the most popular story - A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. The author he-self has said about the story thus -
"I have endeavoured in this Ghostly little book, to raise the Ghost of an Idea, which shall not put my readers out of humour with themselves, with each other, with the season, or with me. May it haunt their houses pleasantly, and no one wish to lay it.

Their faithful Friend and Servant,

C.D.
(December, 1843)"

And truly so, the "Ghost of an Idea" has haunted me ever since then. Though we were a Hindu family and not celebrate X'mas, there always used to hang a colourful little star at the entrance of my house when my Dad was alive. He never failed to buy a new star from one of the street vendors every other year. And I never failed to sit, gazing at the new colourful wonder that he brought home every year at the time of X'mas. It was back in 1992, if I can remember well enough, that I had my only X'mas feast till date. We had an old retired couple as our neighbour and had their three children, all living abroad, come together for that X'mas. So, Lilly aunty decided to host a grand X'mas feast and invited us all for it. I never knew what the occasion was 'coz for me X'mas was all about hanging a colourful star at the door of my home. But that was a new experience for me. They had an X'mas tree, a miniature haystack with the baby Jesus in it and a lot many other things which seems to be vague in my memory. Any how, I joined them in their prayers, songs and happily feasted on the chicken dishes and cakes and ice creams... It was after 4 years that I read about X'mas in A Christmas Carol. I still cherish the only X'mas I had in my life.

After many years, I had a g'friend who was a Christian and I dreamed of that-one-day when I'd be celebrating an X'mas in its true spirit with her family. Her mom makes ginger-vine for every X'mas and she always brought me a portion of it. Oh wow! Such heavenly vine, I've never tasted in my life.

On another occasion, I remember going to a very old Church in a big city in my country and lighting a hundred candles with her. I do not remember whether it had anything to do with X'mas, but it sure happened in the month of December. Even funnier is the fact that my g'friend was an atheist (At least, she claimed to be one!). And a happy and happening X'mas is one more thing I miss after our break up. Now, I do not see how I'd ever celebrate an X'mas in my life! Unfortunately, none of my friends are Christians either!

Last year, I did go to a Church and attend the prayers on the Christmas eve. But it's never fun to be alone, to be an Ekan, in such a gathering. I felt very awkward after a while and returned to my lonely room and spent the night reading A Christmas Carol, maybe for the nth time.

But wait, I don't think I'll be dead so soon. I still have years ahead of me and if things happen as I anticipate, I'd get a chance yet again to attend a Christmas and a Happy New Year in its true spirit and I look forward to that with great joy and expectations.

"Good Eyesight is Fundamental"

2009-11-25T21:02:00.000-08:00

This is one of the smartest ads I've ever seen!

The base line of the add, when translated into English says, "Good eyesight is fundamental"

Agency - AlmapBBDO/Sao Paulo
Client - Art Foco
Writer - Cesar Herszkowicz
Art Director - Gustavo Victorino
Creative Directors - Marcello Serpa & Luiz Sanches

Swami says...

2009-11-25T19:25:00.000-08:00

"Physical bravery is an animal instinct; moral bravery is a much higher and truer courage."

And here we're, trying to justify all our faults by telling others and ourselves, "after all, we're animals too"!

Swami Vivekananda

My friend's leaving

2009-11-23T13:57:00.000-08:00

It's 3 in the morning and I haven't slept yet. In fact, I was out with my friend till now. I had a particularly difficult day today. This friend of mine who is also a colleague was a great comfort for me in my lonely hours. He is the only person with whom I had a one on one open hearted conversations in the past few months. It was in no time that we became good friends from being mere colleagues. He's also my beer-buddy! Besides, he's the only person of my age as my friend in town. So, his sudden announcement of resignation from job did bother me a lot. I felt very distracted and couldn't put my mind in whatever I was doing. After the office hours, I came back home and sat locked in my room as usual. But by about 10'o clock I decided to pay him a visit at his bachelor's room and I didn't wait another minute.

We sat there discussing about a lot of things as usual and by around 12.30 I suggested that we'd go out for a ride and he immediately obliged. And so we roamed around the city for the next two hours. The night patrol man stopped us in between and asked us why are we on the road when we should be cosily curled up under our blankets and dreaming about all the PYT's and CYT's in our life (PYT - Pretty Young Thing & CYT - Cute Young Thing). Maybe 'coz we didn't look like trouble makers that he left us even without the customary warning.

He has put in his papers and will be here till the 30th of this month. And after that... Ah! It's going to be the same lonely days for me.

Also I send a mail to my previous girl friend asking her what happened to her promise of meeting me? Not that I'm too bothered about that meeting now. But ever since she said she'd meet up with me in a few weeks time almost 2 months back, I've been waiting to hear from her. I've given her my number too. But no calls and no intimations of anything so far. And I'm no fool not to understand that she is least bothered to meet me, from her silence. I was just hoping against hope that she'd respect my request for a meeting. Or at least let me know whether we'd be meeting or not. I thought she owed me at least that much of a gentle consideration than to keep me waiting like this. No. I'm not angry or frustrated at her. I possibly can't expect her to be any considerate to me. Yet... Just that it's too much trouble to be expecting to hear from her every time I see an unknown number flashing on the now chewed up (result of Tasha's new found taste for mobile phones) screen of my mobile phone.

What more do I have to say? Nothing, in fact...

I got my song back...

2009-11-19T15:00:00.000-08:00

A second post on the same day! But I can't help but share my excitement in being able to listen to a song long, long forgotten. This is an old Malayalam romantic song rendered K. J. Yesudas in his younger days. What a magnificent voice he had for a boy of his age. He must have been in his late twenties when he sung this song (probably my age!). And I'm not surprised that he shot to fame at such a young age and later on went to be hailed as one of the best voices in the history of Indian music. Fresh and energetic... Ah! How I wish I had a voice like his... Hm... But the song is special not just for the young voice of an iconic singer but also for the soft melodious tune without much nuances and any over play of instruments. And that's how old songs anywhere in the world was. The singer had more prominence and since there was not much of technology to enhance the voice and stuff, the singer always had to give his/her best shot. Besides, there was no space enough for mediocrity. But the techno-world has given relaxation to those stringent rules. Anyone, who sings quite fairly can become a Grammy award winner now-a-days! Even if he has a cold on the day of recording, his sound comes out so well. I feel that the present day songs are not SUNG but MADE with a lot of stuff. Ok! Ok! Let me not sound too much like an old-block-head. The fact remains that those good old songs have survived ages and we still remember the good old Carpenters, Jim Reeves and Elvis where as the new age singers and all the boy and girl bands are fading from memory in no time. I do not want to pass any judgement here (I think I've already done that!) but when it comes to songs, OLD is GOLDER to me.

And here is the song that made my day:

I looked for a karoke for the same song and memorised the lines in no time (I told you, they are simple) and sung it and posted it in my song blog. Here is the link for those who are interested to listen to me singing the same song. CLICK HERE

Ramblings of a non relegious mind...

2009-11-19T08:01:00.000-08:00

I seem to be having a lot of things to discuss but... I'm still struggling to come out... Let's forget the whining part. I'll tell you one thing that has been bothering me since a long time now - God.

Aha! The much debated topic right? But what I want is not to prove whether there truly is a God or not. In fact, that is something very much irrelevant to me. I do not care for the existence of all the Jesus' and Krishnas of the world. To me, someone who feeds me when I'm hungry is God enough.

I had this little conversation with a Christian friend of me over this subject and she tried her best to convince me that there is only one true religion (Christianity) and only one God that is Jesus. Her arguments were clever but nothing new. I've heard it too many times from my other Christian friends to realise that they are all nothing original but Church taught. Lessons (venoms, I'd rather say) fed in Sunday schools. For eg. when I said I can see Krishna in Jesus and Jesus in Krishna she retorted like this - "What if you walk into a diners and find your wife sitting with another man and she tells you she was seeing me in him?". I had to struggle a lot not to laugh at this and I didn't laugh 'coz I didn't want to hurt her. After all, it's her presence that's making my day for a while now!

Are... My wife has to tell such a funny answer only if I roll my eyes at her 'coz I found her sitting with another man! Here, the trouble is with the husband and not with the wife. She might have been sitting with a friend of hers and only when I want to stop her from having male friends that she becomes forced to say such funny things. Else, I can as well, join them at their table and she can introduce me to her friend. And if there's anything more between her and that man, that'd eventually come to light. Why do I have to screw up my happiness by suspecting her? And (hypothetically) what if she truly sees me in him and that she do not have any trouble with that? I may not be able to accept it. Then again, the trouble is with me and not her. The problem here is that I basically do not trust my wife and I've no faith in her. Am I right? So, here comes the question - what's true faith? And my answer is "Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation". And believe me, it's not as easy as it sounds. I, me-self do not have any true faith 'coz I still suspect things, I'm still very speculative about many things but God. I strongly believe that there is a God. But my God is not Jesus or Krishna or Buddha or Allah... To me, he who is capable of true love is God. It could be my friend, my dad, my mom, even my dog...

Let me explain this. Kindness, nobility, courage, moral strength, compassion, caring, nurturing etc. etc. etc. are the things that we attribute to God, am I right? Jesus had all this and he was in human form, for all that we know for sure. And we are ready to call him God. That's fine. I too'd call him God. But I never knew him personally nor did any of you. But if you look around, look close there'd be a person in your life too who has all these qualities but in varying degrees. And you might not have even realised his/her worth in your life when you're busy going to the churches and temples. In my case, it was my dad. He was very caring, supportive, a pillar of strength, courageous, noble and a morally correct person. Why can't he be God, as well? The argument my friend had was that unlike my dad, Jesus was born without any sexual intercourse between Joseph and Mary! And how true can that be? It is said so in Bible, all right. But is that enough (a book which gets printed at the the press in my neighbourhood) proof of Jesus' miraculous birth? After all, Jesus could have been just another abandoned child whom these couples found out by chance! But does it really matter? Why should someone become God just 'coz his birth was shrouded in mystery? Then none of the Hindu God's ever had a proper birth for that reason. Lord Ganesha was carved from sandal wood. Lord Muruga was born out of a lotus. Lord Ayyappa was born out of a magical unison of two male Gods (Shiva and Vishnu) and the list continues. And all these are recorded in our various mythological texts (Puranas). What about them? They too had non-sexual births. Is that enough to consider them Gods? And for that matter, our mythological texts speak of even Asuras (Demons) who had such magical, no-sex involved, births! What about them?

Then there she tried to convince me by telling me that, Jesus did magical curing! Are, even demi-god people like Sai Baba and Amruthanandamai do magical curing almost every single day. There are true life testimonials of ascetics at the foothills of Himalayas who does magical curing. Are they Gods? Oh mine, then India is so full of Gods!

Her next argument was that Jesus got himself crucified for the betterment of humanity. In that case, I'd like Krishna better to have caused the war between Pandavas and the evil Kauravas and got the latter killed and saved a whole nation from the clutches of evil doers. I admire Shiva to be so short tempered and kills every demon with one swish of his Trishul!

I do not know how many of you're still reading this. If you're still reading this, I promise you'd not be disappointed by me. I promise not to hurt any of your religious sentiments.

My point is not to prove Jesus was a lesser God. All I want to say is that Jesus is as much a God as Krishna is; as much a God as my Dad was. Jesus is as much a God as my friend who fed me for one whole month without twitching his one eye brow when I was jobless and penniless and lost in a big city. There is no one God in this world. This world is not such a small place. It is big enough to afford a million Jesus' but with other names and perceived in other faiths. And contrary to what she said, I do not believe that there's only one way to salvation. There are so many of them in the forms of different religions, faiths etc. etc. etc. Only when you can understand the true meaning of FAITH that you'll ever attain any kind of salvation.

Every religion talks about loving humanity, loving your neighbour as much as you love thy self, caring for your fellow beings, not to hurt others, to be righteous, noble and courageous. Just that the different religious texts talk about these things in a different tone and in different languages. If you can read between the printed lines in your Bible, Quaran, Geeta or whatever, that's all the message is - Love. Love each other and protect each other. And what does that imply? It means that we are all capable of being Gods and we need to try and be that and not just mere mortals leading an existence of "I" and "mine" (I'm a Christian, I'm a Hindu, my people, my community...). Good that you have things for yourself and do consider it to be the best in the world. But others have their best things too. Respect each other, be accommodative... love each other (not the selfish love of I'd love my neighbour only if he believes in the same things that I do. That's no love at all).

Why is there so much of intolerance of other faiths when you yourself have not understood the true meaning of FAITH; when you yourself wouldn't trust your husband or wife with another person? Why this rivalry between religions? Why the blood sheds? Why? Why? Why?

And here is a call to all those who call themselves atheists and never miss an opportunity to sling mud on the concept of God and religions - You often ask, why are there so many natural disasters and why are so many women getting raped? And you smile and say, "see, there's no God". I do not wish to counter this. But let me ask you, why are you not doing anything about these inhumanistic activities going around in the world in the name of religion? Why don't you ever question them? Why don't you ever try to stop them? Why don't you urge your governments to bring about a rule that says "fighting over religion is a national crime that'd win you capital punishment"? What gain if you finally did prove that there is no such thing as God? Millions would've shed their blood and dear lives by the time you prove that you are intellectually superior to others in so meticulously being able to argue and prove that there's no God! See my point here? You might not even have enough people around you to celebrate your mighty victory over God!

Ah! Gr... I'm becoming a preacher myself! Good Lord, save me!!! I pray to you to either open the eyes of people and make them look at the truth or (if it's my eyes that's closed) open my eyes enough to agree to such horrible truths like "there's only one God", "there's only one true religion" and stuff.

As such, I too believe that there's only one God (that's there in you and me) and one religion that is Humanity.

I'm back...

2009-11-15T19:43:00.000-08:00

Hi all,

I'm back. Not that I feel completely all right but the worst is over. I do not know what exactly was bothering me. I had been thinking a bit about my future, my career and then the most dreadful thing that is loneliness. All through the last week, I was feeling very gloomy, down and out. One main thing that triggered me was my apprehensions about my career. I work as a copy writer with an advertising agency in my town and I've not got any major break through since I joined this company in June. I'm someone brought up in a school of extensive writing - essays, feature articles, travelogues etc. and to convey things in a couple of sentences (couple of words even!) was something nearly close to impossible to me. I've ever been struggling and fumbling. But I was not too bothered about this as long as I enjoyed my work. But something happened a week ago. I didn't mention it then as I was not too clear about it me-self. My Creative Director happened to see some photographs taken by me and he was very much impressed by it. Now, photography is not my profession and just a fine hobby. He's aware of my difficulty with writing advertisement copies. And so he goes on to praise my skill in photography for about half hour and said I should be going out and trying my luck at photography than sitting there and writing copies. He was very genuine in what he said and I got all mixed up! The thing is, I'd love to take photography as my career but can't do it in my present financial condition. It requires an amount of investment on my part which I can't afford right now. I thought about this, thought about this... and finally some nuts and screws fell loose in my head. And along with that all the other things that were waiting for the Devil in my head to open the doors of my brain, just rushed in and wrecked havoc! I started becoming worried about just anything and everything around me. I started philosophising about the futility of human existence!!! Ha! ha! ha! And I guess, that's what every looser does in this world! Since they feel too weak to fight and their pride doesn't let them admit that they are weak, the next best thing he can do is to blame the world and make it look like one worthless, infertile land where no seeds of human efforts would ever sprout! I mean, look at the advantage of making oneself believe this. He's free of any responsibility of his actions and if he becomes a failure, it's not 'coz he didn't try enough but 'coz the world is not good enough to recognize his efforts. But if by any luck by chance he finally triumphs, he can always turn back and say, "Oh my God! What a fool I was all these years? I never knew "I" had so much in me to fight such an ugly world". Now, now, I've done that and I'm sure you've done that too at some point of your life. But believe me, that's when we truly fail. That's when we make ourselves the biggest fools in this world. 'coz we take credit for something that we never tried for and are too vain and proud to admit that our triumph was nothing but pure luck! Am I right? I do not think not too many people in here can contradict me in this. Any ways... I played my part in the usual blame game for over a week now and today morning, something seems to've struck my head from the blue and that made me see more sense in things. At least, I'm now sure about what I should be doing ahead. Yesterday I called up a professional photographer (just like that) and said I'd like him to review my photos. He agreed. Now, this means nothing. I might as well meet him, hear him talk about things new and just come back and feel depressed for another week or so. Let it be. At least I made my first move and once I do that I know there's no stopping me. I'll fight till the end even if it means a failure. But I promise not to give up without a good fight.

So friends, I'm back. And I'll soon come visiting all your lovely blogs and keep updating you about the crazy things in my life.

And let me thank all of you who showed such genuine concern for me and thanks again for all the love that was showered over me. Though I never responded then and sat stiff like a dumb duck, please know that my heart goes out to all who took the pain and time to leave such comforting words in my previous post! Thank you all and Thanks again...

With love,
Ekan

I'm so lonely, I'm so blue & I'm lost...

2009-11-08T10:02:00.000-08:00

I know I've not been very active in here since a few days. I'm not visiting other blogs and I'm not commenting on posts too. It's 'coz I've not been feeling too good since a few days. I do not know what or why? I'm into a phase of brooding and my mind's always pre occupied. I'm anxious about something. I'm worried. I'm... Ah! I do not know what. Something seems to be troubling me. Something is unsettling me. It's been days since I had a good sleep. Been days since I ate properly. Ah! Gr!!! I can't pretend to be happy any more. I can't pretend to be all right any more. I'm... I'm... Hm...

Kindly excuse my absence and my much erratic behaviour. I'm unable to concentrate on just anything let alone blogging. I'm afraid I'm slowly slipping away from all of you. Wish you were all real people in my life - I mean, it freaks me out to see that the only people in my daily life and with whom I can share my heart's secrets are all so away and are nearly strangers to me. The only living thing with whom I share any sense of intimacy in my day to day life is Tasha. I love her, all right. But the poor thing can never substitute a human companion, can it? Why...

I know I'm proving to be a real laughing stoke by whining so publicly. But I can't keep it in my mind any more.

I'm so lonely, I'm so blue and I'm so lost!!!

Yet another theme blog

2009-11-06T01:26:00.000-08:00

Hi all!

I've started yet another blog solely dedicated to stories from Hindu and other mythologies of the world. These are stories that were told to me by my dad when I was a kid and taking into consideration the vast majority of my followers from outside India, I thought it'd be an interesting thing to tell you all about the stories from the Hindu mythology that you might have never heard of. I do not intend to propagate or popularise Hinduism. Religion is the last thing you should think of when you visit that blog. All I want to do is to share with you such fascinating stories which I grew up listening to. And believe me, some of the stories are so really interesting that I'm sure, at least some of you are going to come back and visit that blog again and again. Also, these are good bed time stories for your kids if you have run short of all those fairy tales and other stories of elves and goblets.

And for those who are familiar with the stories from Hindu mythology, I need to bring to your notice that almost every story has another version which you might have heard off. These are stories that were passed on to generations after generations and it has always been a subject to modification. What remains the same is the moral that these stories were intended to propagate. So, do not feel aghast that I told a story in a different perspective. As I told you, these are the ones which were told to the little me by my dad. I'm only reproducing it from my memory.

And here is the link to my new blog - Myths, Tales & More...

Ekan to the rescue...

2009-11-05T08:10:00.000-08:00

Today, as I was riding back from my office, I stopped for a light snack at a little snack bar. As I stood there munching on a meat roll and sipping on a bottle of soda, I heard a distant cry - "meeeooow, meeeoow". I immediately looked around the place. It was dark and couldn't see anything. I took the flash light from my pocket and flashed it around and I saw a tiny little kitten wedged between two gunny bags and mewing at me. One look at it and I picked it up and guess what? It was an abandoned kitten. The store keeper who was standing near me asked me whether I'd be interested in giving it a shelter. I took a second look at it. It was thin and sickly yet very cute. It had a ginger grey coat and a long tail too. I immediately remembered one of my colleagues asking me for a kitten. The next thing I do is put it in my bag and bring it home. I lost my colleagues number and so couldn't call her up and ask whether she was still interested in a kitten. And so I took a few pics. of this cat and send her her a mail with the pics. Hope this little kitten gets a home soon! I could've kept it me-self if not for Tasha. Contrary to what I thought, Tasha is being attacked by this fierce little lady!

"The name is Ekan, Ekanthapadhikan"

2009-11-04T04:10:00.000-08:00

Ideally, this should have been the first post in my blog. But I was not aware that my name - Ekanthapadhikan - would raise such curiosity among others. In fact, I never gave a second thought to it when I had to choose a nick name for me-self. Eventually, I noticed that people who could make sense out of my nick name liked it and others (maybe) took it for a real name. And for those who thought it to be my real name, well, it's not. It's a nick name that I've been using for a long time now, though I started using it in public forums only recently.

Well, well Ekanthapadhikan means 'A lonely wanderer' - 'Ekan' means 'lonely' and 'Padhikan' means a person who walks around. This is a word in my mother tongue, Malayalam and it is never used as a real name. It's a qualifying word that explains the state of being of a man.

And why did I choose this name? The answer is simple. Throughout my life till date, I've always found me-self to be an odd person out in my family, in society and among my friends.

My family on my father's side is a typical patriarchal, conservative one and I've always been accused of being less 'Man' like 'coz I contradict their ideas of getting their girls married in their early 20's and 'coz I always supported the idea of their daughters taking up a job and getting financially independent before they could get tied down by a marriage. Even my cousins on my father's side are all their predecessor's mould and obviously they find it difficult to mix with me. Also because they follow a set of traditions and values so blindly when, I ask questions against it. They think I'm a rebel, a lunatic, a self willed and arrogant person. But I'm not all that. In fact, I do value and respect my tradition but wouldn't follow it blindly. And so, I'm not accepted very whole heartedly there.

My mom's family is only a name-sake family. I don't find them close to each other and they're so totally unscrupulous but very educated people. They value nothing and doubts everyone. They're the kinds who wouldn't send their daughters with their fathers and thinks very great about it. They are all big time hypocrites who think they're the most sophisticated and perfect people on this planet. And I don't even know how many cousins I have on that side. You can guess, there isn't even a question of me-self getting along with them.

Coming to friends, well, I do have a handful of friends who love me, trust me and treats me well. But unfortunately I do not share much things with them be it music, movies, books or just anything. They find my tastes very odd though they do not object to them and at times even like me for my quirkiness. And I love them back with all their faults and miss givings just like they love me. But that doesn't make me feel any less lonelier either.

Besides my favourite pass time is to go on bike rides to different places and all that I usually have for a companion would be my camera with recharged cells in it. And that makes me an Ekanthapadhikan - The lonely wanderer!

And that's the story behind my name.

And now, many of you shortened my name to Ekan (meaning a 'lonely man') which sounds much better. In fact, there were instances when I signed my mail as Ekan and later correct it.

So... What say?

Does your name has a story behind it?

Two Awards & 30+ handouts (You could've received one too!)

2009-11-03T08:11:00.000-08:00

Ah! I'm Happy. I'm Happy, Hippy, Hoppy... to announce that I received two awards for my blogs.

Let me not go too much into the details. My first award is the Superior Scribbler Award which was handed out to me by both Meenakshi Nair @ Ponderings and Betty Manousos @ CUT AND DRY. THANKS A LOT FRIENDS!!!

And that's why Meenakshi gave me this award - "A multi talented person, whose writing is as good as his singing. Oh, and must say he too is a multiple blogger, like me".

But this award comes with some rules and they are:

Each Superior Scribbler must in turn pass The Award on to 5 most-deserving Bloggy Friends.
Each Superior Scribbler must link to the author & the name of the blog from whom he/she has received The Award.
Each Superior Scribbler must display The Award on his/her blog, and link to This Post, which explains The Award.
Each Blogger who wins The Superior Scribbler Award must visit this post and add his/her name to the Mr. Linky List. That way, we'll be able to keep up-to-date on everyone who receives This Prestigious Honor!
Each Superior Scribbler must post these rules on his/her blog.

And so I pass this award to these 5 people that I choose in random among to the 50+ bloggers that I follow.

Brian Miller @ WAYSTATIONONE, for maintaining a blog with a clean posts rich in imagination and good language.
Matthew @ AbodeOne Three, for sheer descriptive elegance that he brings to his each post.
SupahMommy @ Adventures of a Wanna-Be SupahMommy, for making me laugh without a fail every time I visit her.
Steven Anthony @ No Excuse, No Explanation, for maintaining a blog so vivid with his own experiences and unique regular columns like 'Friday Phone Calls'
Braja @ LOST and FOUND in INDIA, for the kind of very insightful things that she writes about. She calls herself a Blogging Yogini' and I can't agree any less to that.

And here is the Mr. Linky List for you to register your name as the recepient of this award.

*****************************************************************************

Ok, now to my second award. This is called 'A present For Your Blog' award and this was given to me by MITR-FRIEND @ My Travelogue. I got this one for my travel blog - Where The Roads Take Me. I'm surprised that I got an award for that blog 'coz that's the least noticed of the 5 blogs that I maintain. I'm overwhelmed at this!!! THANKS A LOT MITR!

And look at what she had to say about me - "A biker man from Kerala who goes wherever the road take him. A brand new yet a promising blog. And I actually like his name very much".

Luckily, there are no rules attached to this award. There is no passing this award to X number of other bloggers. But, I can't ignore the fact that I got these awards 'coz of you. And how better can I show my gratitude to all those who had taken the time to go through my blogs? And so I pass on this award to the following people:

Meenakshi Nair @ Ponderings (Obviously)
Betty Manousos @ CUT AND DRY (Obviously)
Stacy J Warner @ Stacey's Respite
Chief @ (Hiding from the Kids)
Mama Zen @ The Zen Of Motherhood
Lisa E @ FROM THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN
Shadow @ 1 DOOR AWAY FROM HEAVEN
Extranjera @ WHAT WILL I EVER DO WITH MY LIFE
Dulce @ SWEETER POETRY
Unknown Mami @ Unknown Mami
Vodka Logic @ VODKA LOGIC
Lily Robinson @ Becoming an author... my journey
Amy @ JUST ADD WALTER
Joanna Jenkins @ The Fifty Factor
Mary @ 365 Days
Secretia @ SECRET STORY TIME
ER @ WHERE MOUNTAINS MEET THE SEA
Otin @ WIZARD OF OTIN
Fireblossom @ WORD GARDEN
Lena @ WHAT LENA LEAVES...
Amy @ ... (Now, that's her blog's name)
Jo @ Diary Of A Sad Housewife
Kelly Muys Wood @ tearing up houses
Eva Grant @ Wrestling with Retirement
Vodka Mom @ Vodkamom
Toddler Brain @ TODDLER brain
Charmaine@ MIDDLE AGED DATING
Manic Mother @ Manic Mother
Gloria @ GLORIA'S SPANISH VIEW
Dean Grey @ EXPLODING DOUGHNUT
Cathy Clementz @ Yooper Yarns
Riot Kitty @ Riot Kitty
Teresa @ TOO MANY HEARTBEATS
Dreamer @ Gawd's Own Country
Pram @ SOULSEARCH
Joanne May @ Joanne May Illustration
Kaiserin Sisi @ RAMBLING'S OF A HOTELIER'S WIFE
Love Love Melissa @ Love Love Melissa
Sassy Chica @ Sassy Chica

Puf... pant... woooo... I think that's enough for now.

And, I'll not say that these are all the bloggers who I follow regularly. In fact, I do not follow more than maybe 10 or 15 blogs on a regular basis. But we've all visited each other's blogs one time or the other and have left such wonderful comments that were an inspiration for me to keep blogging. If not for you, I would've stopped blogging long back! And I take this opportunity to tell you that I have not forgotten you and also that your presence at my blog will always be remembered.

Now, if anyone still feels that I've missed out on you it's either 'coz I find some of the blogs not accessible any more or 'coz I simply missed out on you (I couldn't sit and find each one of you. I'm sorry.)

And finally, Tasha & Ekan Thank You All for your wonderful support and encouragements!

(Ops! I can't pose for a decent pic. ever since I had that wretched chickenpox)

My first karoke attempt

2009-11-02T09:02:00.000-08:00

Never before have I tried singing with a karoke and simply because I didn't know how to do it. Whenever I listen to someone singing to a karoke, I see that it's as good as the original track. I never bothered to find out how they do it. I mean, the mixing of sound and all is so perfect. I always thought there were a lot of machines involved and hence always kept me-self away from it. But today, suddenly and just like that I felt like giving it a try. But I do not have a proper recording device or anything with me. I only had my trusted Sony Ericsson W550i mobile phone, which is what I use to maintain my song blog (Ekan learns to sing...). I contemplated on the idea and finall came up with "wtf, I'll try with what I have and that's it. So I downloaded a karoke track of one of my favourite songs (Minnalae nee vandhadenadi..., which is a Tamil song from the movie 'May Madham') and just sang along with and recorded it using my mobile phone. It came out to be much better than I anticipated! Though there were a lot of disturbance and crackling noise, I think I managed to pull the stunt.

Today, I invite you all to my song blog to hear me pull the karoke stunt!

Click here...

Tasha & Me-self!

2009-11-01T12:49:00.000-08:00

Couldn't squeeze in much time to write more and hence posting some pics. of my dear girl, Tasha and a scary self portrait of me-self!

See, I give her a good pillow to sleep on and she absolutely loves it.

She got a bit scared at the clicking noise made by my camera!

And that's the scary self portrait that I was telling you about...

The much awaited review and the result

2009-10-31T09:01:00.000-07:00

Ah! I had my much awaited review of my official performance today. I've been waiting for this since the past two weeks. Today I just walked into my boss' room and said I need to be given a feed back on my performance till date. He said ok and asked me to bring the copies of everything I did till date.

I had to my credit 7 print ads, three invites, one brochure and a few odd and other write-ups, the copies of which he splayed on the desk in front of him. A few minutes of going through it and he said just what I long expected to hear - "not good". He said the work that I've done since I joined this company in June is nothing short of "zilch". And I couldn't agree with him more. I have been reviewing my own work and found out that I have got nothing substantial to my credit yet! Now, isn't that bad? Yes it is, and very much so.

And why couldn't I give my best till now? The reasons are umpteen and yet, they're only reasons. The fact remains that I've been working with an ad agency for nearly 5 months and I haven't been able to give my best shot yet. Let me take this opportunity to express my gratitude to the company and the people in here for being so nice with me. And my boss was just being very honest with me and in the most gentlemanly way that I could've ever expected of him. He could have shouted at me. He could've humiliated me. He could've broken the little confidence that's left in me. But no. He did what a wise man could've ever done. He said the most honest things to me and put the ball in my court. He asked me how long will I need to prove that I can better me-self. Without having to think twice I said, till the end of December failing which, I'll quit this job. So that's it. I've till the end of this year to prove that I haven't lost the game yet. But here is my real predicament. Is advertising my cup of tea? I love the field but I'm very aware of my limitations as a copy writer. If not this, then what is the profession that I'd fit in the best? I'm rather confused. This is the problem of being a "Jack of some trades and master of none". But I'm not going to think about it now. To me, I've till the end of December. And I've decided to give it my best shot and if I fail even after that, I'll gracefully quit the scene, not as a failure but as someone who fought till his last breath and lost.

And to tell you the lame reasons for my under performance, here they're:

I was very underconfident about me-self. Just beginning to cope up with things after a series of successive blows in my personal life.
I couldn't keep my personal life apart from my professional life. I'm just beginning to learn to do this very important thing in a professional's life.
Lack of a social life has driven me to become a habitual brooder.
Too many other distractions in my life like the hang over of a terrible break-up, desperateness to find a companion, too much into things other than my work like blogging and bike rides.
Lack of proper reading (Haven't completed a decent book, not even a magazine in the past one year).
Hang over of a terrible experience with my past job which lead to my lack of confidence.
The crazy household that I'm in that gives me no peace of mind and makes me feel very insecure.
Letting all the PYT's, Lost Love and stupid things distract me, which is again due to my desperateness to find a companion.
etc.
etc.
etc.

Now, I cannot tell all this to my boss 'coz it's none of his botheration. He pays me to get his job done and if I've other reasons not to do them, I better quit. And I think that's a fare and square deal. After all, I owe that to a company and a boss who was so much accommodating.

So dear friends, I wouldn't be bothering you all for a while now 'coz it's a do or die thing for me. 31st of December is going to be very decisive for me. I don't care even if I do not succeed. But I'm not going to quit as a looser before I give it one last good fight. What to do? I'm a martyr by birth!

The careless Cupid!

2009-10-30T04:03:00.000-07:00

My last post was about me-self getting enchanted by Celtic music and the magical voice of Loreena McKennitt. And I was honest in telling you all that I found it difficult to concentrate on anything else including my work. Whenever I get a minute's break or whenever I forcefully pulled me-self out of the routine events in my life, I found listening to her songs over and over again. But most of your responses rather confuse me. There were many of you who said, I'm "in love"!

Yes. That's true. I fell in love with Celtic music and Loreena's voice. Is that what all of you were referring to? Or were you telling me about something else? The more people who commented that I was in Love, I got more and more confused. And now, I've reached a point where all my thoughts are getting mixed up! Am I in love? I mean, am I really in love with something, someone else and I didn't realise it? Did that Stupid, Careless Cupid send another one of his god forsaken arrows right into my heart? Ah!!! This is ridiculous. This cannot be. I do not want to feel any of those silly butterflies in my tummy again. At least not for a while...

But what is this? In the silence and darkness of the night, along with the haunting, intoxicating Celtic music in my head, do I also hear a flap of some wings? Do I hear an extra thud of drums not in my ears but in my chest? I thought it was all a part of the orchestra, and it's that soft, delicate flaps and thuds that makes me go back to those songs. And who is that fairy with blue wings with me in the deep woods? I was not aware of her presence until all of you said that I'm in love. I thought I was alone in those deep, dark and enchanting Celtic woods! But no...

Ah! Grrr.... The Careless Cupid!

Or maybe, I'm getting things mixed up. All this could very well be the beginning of a beautiful friendship!

Caught in an enchantment!

2009-10-28T13:34:00.000-07:00

Oh! This is unbelievable. 3 days back I stumbled upon a piece of music in Joanne May's blog. It was the video of a live performance by Loreena McKennitt. And... And... I've been listening to her songs ever since then! I simply can't get the music out of my head. Her enchanting voice and the utter magic of Celtic music has caught me in a spell!

I'm unable to think about anything else; unable to concentrate on my work; unable to do just anything. I FELL IN LOVE WITH IT!!! My ears are always plugged and with the music playing inside my head. Oh! The rumbling timbrels, the haunting pipes, the mournful violin, the harp, the tabala... The experience is just haunting and so enchanting! And Loreena... Oh! She just sounds like an enchantress invoking a 1000 ghosts from their graves with her songs...

Besides all this I observe an uncanny similarity between Celtic music and Indian Hindustani music. But as I realize it now, though the Hindustani music is pursued largely in India, it was brought to this land by the Persians and the Moughals and later on got stylised to suit the musical taste of the land. And I see Celtic music as either the original and authentic mix of Hindustani and the folk song of the Celtic region or as a contemporary fusion of the two, which is the case with Loreena's. Any which ways, I'm so thoroughly enchanted by Loreena and her gang of musicians!

Writing a post was not enough and so I went ahead and wrote something like a poem - The Celtic Enchantress. Interested people can just click on the title and you'll be taken to the poem.

And here's the song that enchanted me:

Image Courtesy: www.huffingtonpost.com

'Silhouette' & 'Mummer's Dance'

2009-10-26T14:59:00.000-07:00

Hi folks,

I just finished giving the final touches to a short story that I've been trying to write since I was in college. I did write it then and got it published in our department's manuscript magazine. But it never got the response I expected and I knew why. 'coz it was too obscure and full of personal elements and could never reach to the reader. Ever since then I wanted to improvise it and give it one more shot. And after almost 6 years, I got the old manuscript out of my shelf and dusted it and went through it again. I sat staring at the ceiling of my room and listening to Loreena McKennitt's 'Mummer's Dance'. Maybe that her magical and mystical voice and the pipes and timbrels of the Scandinavian music inspired me, I sat down and reworked on the whole story and there I'm, I could finally give it a form and shape that could take it to a reader! The story is titled 'Silhouette'.

I request everyone of your attention to that story and leave your most valuable feedbacks as comments. This is something really important to me. This is the much hyped and ambitious creation that I've ever boasted about and I'd need your very frank opinion on it. And please don't disappoint me by filling the comments columns with adjectives like "Excellent", "Brilliant", if you do not mean it. Feel free to call it a total crap. Good or bad, I need your very honest response to it.

So if you're ready to read my story click here.

Also, I couldn't help but learn the Mummer's Dance and sing it to you all. Please click here to listen to me sing that magical tune of Loreena. Cannot say I did full justice to the song but I did give my best shot!

Ekan dabbles with cooking - Sweet Lassi

2009-10-25T02:50:00.000-07:00

Ahem! This is funny, I know. But here onwards you'll find this regular but very irregular column in my blog. I think the name has it all - 'Ekan dabbles with cooking'.

Ye! "Dabbles with cooking". And that's 'coz I have no more than a passing fancy for cooking. To say that I'm "no good at it" would be an exaggeration. I'm bad, really bad at it!!!

Having said that, I do get into the kitchen and try my luck at cooking once in a blue moon day. The result? God's grace, I've still not been sued of setting ablaze a kitchen!

The best dish I've made so far is the Egg-Noodles and (hi!) I'm an expert in that! Anyone who has had the misadventure of sharing my culinary skills has agreed to that! In fact, when I was living with room mates (12 of us) in Bangalore, it was almost a routine to have Egg-Noodles prepared by Master Chef Ekan and Chicken Curry made by a less popular but my assistant Chef Sadique Ali for dinners on Saturdays. Every one of them would buy their packet of noodles and eggs and I put them all together to prepare this heavenly, exotic Egg-Noodles which the poor souls used to sit around and gobble up with that 'ok-ok' tasting Chicken Curry (OMG! How I long to have that chicken curry! I've never tasted such delicious chicken dish ever before or after! Bless the female who is going to marry him! There were times when I wished we were gays so that I'd get a life time supply of that chicken curry!!).

Ok! Ok! I'll talk about how to prepare that Egg Noodles in a later edition. As this is the first in this 'post-of-a kind' one, I'll talk about a much simpler thing to make so that you can all keep up with my extra ordinary cooking skills. Ever heard of Sweet Lassi? Ah! And that's the thing that I'm going to teach you to make.

What do you need?

Hm! Let me see... Yoghurt or curd, sugar, crushed cardamom, mint leaves and crushed cashews or peanuts (do not fry these nuts and have oil dripping from it). Hm... I think that'll do...

How to prepare?

Step 1:

Now, if you have curd, all your troubles are saved. Just put the amount of sugar you want in the curd, churn it well in a bowl using a spoon. If you can't find a spoon around, you can even use a knife, the handle of your dish scrubber or anything that's solid and serves the purpose (I'll leave it to your imagination and creativity. But my word of caution is that you better clean the object thoroughly before you immerse it in the bowl of curd!). Do not use your hands to do this 'coz it'd take more time!

Better even, you can use your mixer. Put the above said contents in a mixer and switch the mixer on. Count 1, 2, 3 and 4. Note that, you need to clearly pronounce the syllables of these numbers like v-o-n (1), tw-uu (2), thr-ee (3) and (do not forget to say "and") fo-or (4). Now, switch the mixer off.

If you're using yoghurt, add a little water to it and make it a bit more aqueous. Once this is done, follow the same procedure as said before.

Step 2:

Actually, there is no 'step 2' to this. Your Sweet Lassi is ready! You can serve this is a beer mug, or any tall glass.

Top this exquisite drink with mint leaves, crushed cardamom and crushed cashew nuts or pea-nuts or any one of these. You can also add a little flavoured essence like strawberry, green apple, raspberry or anything of your choice. But remember that this is a light drink best suited for your sunny afternoons and better don't add too many things to it and make it heavy on your stomach. And please avoid any citrous fruits or essence like lemon or orange 'coz it'd spoil the whole thing.

You can also add a pinch of salt 'coz a combination of sweet and salt is really good for your stomach. And one of my faithful readers who came on-line just as soon as I published this post said 'black salt' would taste great with this. You can try it if you want.

The Master Chef, he-self, would prefer to have his Sweet Lassi with just the mint leaves and a pinch of salt in it.

That's it. The Great Indian Lassi is right on your table!

Now, write back to me your experiences of serving Sweet Lassi to your kids, neighbours and friends @ masterchefekan@ymail.com (This is not my personal mail id. This is an official mail id of Master Chef Ekan)

I'd publish your feed backs as "Testimonials from those who have tried this and lived to tell the tale" at the bottom of this post (you'll find that the column is already there 'coz I do expect you to respond) and let the world know how good a Chef that Ekan is.

Testimonials from those who have tried this and lived to tell the tale:

This can't be happening to me!

2009-10-22T14:47:00.000-07:00

I know, I said I'd be taking a "short non-commercial break" for a few days. But I have to share this with you. This is extra ordinary!

I don't know what came over me today. Never have I experienced such a thing before in my life. The day had been very hectic at the office. But I was this super human finishing one task after another.

Usually it takes me at least two days to figure out a good line for an ad or half a day to conceptualise an invite or other stuff. But today turned out to be something extra ordinary. I churned up lines for two ads and was done with other lighter tasks like copy correction and stuff. Whether the lines for the ads would get a green signal from the client is something yet to be seen. But the good sport I'm, I'm not too bothered about the result as long as I'm satisfied with my attempt. Besides these nerve crunching and hair pulling jobs, I found time to pen down three poems, one in Malayalam (my mother tongue), which I also translated into English and two in English. The story doesn't end there. I returned home by 8.30 p.m and after dinner I took Tasha (My pet puppy, for those who are not yet familiar) out for a walk in my street. Unlike other days, I carried my camera with me and as luck would have it, I spotted quite a few things to focus my lens on.

Also, I found out that Tasha had grown taller when she stood up and put her paws on the wash basin in the bathroom when I was standing there brushing my teeth. Now, did I feel like a proud dad? I don't know, for I've never been a dad. But I sure did feel proud. And to top it all, I took her out for a night ride on my bike in my neighbourhood. And I'm not at all exaggerating when I'm telling you that she perfectly enjoyed her little treat.

And the day ends with me posting a song in Ekan learns to sing.

This can't be true! This can't be happening to me! This just can't be true!! I cannot be doing all these in a single day!!!

Check out my creative outbursts:
A Soul's Prayer (Poem)
My Mother (Poem)
കാലം - (Malayalam Poem with translation alongside)
ഒരു പ്രണയഗീതം - 'A love song' (This is a Malayalam Poem that I wrote in my college when I was wistfully eyeing my girl. Translation included)
Untitled (Pic. of my neighbour's cat. I bet this one is unique)
Belated Happy Diwali (Pic. of a fire work)
Varamanjaladiya... (Malayalam song)

Ok. Now back to work. I've quite a lot to do before I can return to you all. And thanks for all your prayers and well wishes. I'd really need it...

Taking a short non-commercial break

2009-10-20T21:07:00.000-07:00

Dear all,

I'm taking a short non-commercial break for a few days from blogging. I may not be able to post on a regular basis or visit your blogs. No. I've got no brain tumour or anything and I'm not being rushed to the hospital. Neither am I leaving you all to go for a honeymoon to

Mauritius

so un-announced. I've two major things coming my way this week and I need to put in my maximum effort in there.

1. My Creative Director said he'd review me on all the work that I've done do far. And that means I might be confirmed and given a pay-hike this month. It also means, he's going to screw my happiness and say I'm not creative enough or worse even, worthy enough to continue working, which in other words means, I'll have to continue as a trainee Copy Writer for another few months. My knees are going weak and I feel a lump in my throat. Am I falling sick?

2. This is something more important - I've been contemplating on raising a social issue to the attention of the media (I'm sorry I can't reveal what it is). Couldn't decide how I should go about doing it. A couple of my friends who are in the media said they're interested and would be willing to help me out. A lot of data mining and research work need to be done on that. So, I'd need to spend as much of my time as possible on this one.

Hope things go well. I'd need all your prayers and well wishes.

Mean while I'd request your attention to my other blogs viz.

Ekan leanrs to sing... (A blog where I regularly post songs sung by me-self)

Just Gibberish (A blog where I've posted some of my creative writings like poems and short stories)

Shutterbug clicking away... (Where I've posted my experiments in photography)

Where the roads take me... (Where I've posted travel writings on my various bike trips)

I'll be posting in my music and photo blogs every now and then 'coz that doesn't take me much time to do it. Also, I'll be dropping in your blogs every now and then.

I'd be more than happy to see you in my other blogs too.

Yours truly,
Ekan

The Rescue

2009-10-19T14:38:00.000-07:00

First of all, thank you all for stopping by my last post and encouraging me with your kind-kindest words. It did it's part in curing me. I'll ever be grateful to all of you for that. And for burdening up your mind I'm back again, feeling all relaxed and pepped up with a real fun post. This was an older post which I put in before anyone of you started following me. I'm deleting that post and reposting it here.

So here is another leaf out of my crazy life for you all to read and discover another face of the brooding, sulking Ekan that I was in my last post.

This happened to me almost a couple of years back when I was working in Bangalore. As is my very nature, I did not fail to befriend a few dogs in Shantinagar (I lived with room mates for an year there) and this particular black beauty was my favourite because she was the only one who used to welcome me without a fail every evening when I returned from work. I don't know from where, but she always used to come and play with me every night when I go out for a walk and I used to treat her with biscuits which was usually my dinner. See, we ate from the same plate too (metaphorically)! Ours was a relation that took root from day one. "Love at first sight"? Hm! You can call it that way...

And she disappeared for days together and just like that. I searched for her at every nook and corner of the street when I went out for my regular walks at night. But she was nowhere to be seen. Another heart break? Oh! I was not ready for that since it was hardly a couple of months since my break up with my girl.

One fine morning, on the way to my office I saw her poking her head out of the gutter by the road just as seen in this pic.

"Where the hell were you? And why the hell are you there?", I asked her.

A dumb stare is all that I got for an answer.

"Ok. I don't have the time for you now. Need to rush to the office. See you in the evening", I said and I moved on but not before taking a snap of her with my camera that I usually always carry around and giving a nice little pat on her head.

To my shock I saw her in the same spot, sticking her head out through the gap between the slabs that covered the gutter, when I returned from work in the evening. Now, I got worried at this. I stopped and looked at her. She made no attempts to move. I walked to the nearby shop and got a packet of biscuits and tried to entice her out. She still didn't move. She just kept looking at me with that dumb expression. "Good Lord! What's this?". I went near her and stroked her head and asked her to come out but in vain. It was only then I realized that she was stuck in there!

I immediately ran into my room, put my bag down and came back to the spot. And there started a rescue mission which I'm sure none of you'll ever forget reading about. This would become history and I'm so damn sure about that. Ok, let me not hype it too much. Read on...

I put my hand around her neck and tried to pull her out gently. Phew! No result. I began to get desperate. I borrowed a crowbar from the nearby house and tried to dislocate the slabs. It didn't move an inch. And all the while she kept staring at me. Out of sheer desperation I caught hold of her ears and tried pulling her out of the gutter. Still not happening! She simply wouldn't budge! And then, suddenly she just disappeared into the gutter. I panicked, I shrieked, I sweared at the top of my voice, I cursed my stars... The whole street was witnessing this sudden commotion made by me. All eyes were on me... curious, amazed, admiration... I could feel it all.

There was only one another way to rescue her. There was an opening at one end of the gutter. I have to get in through that opening, crawl up to where she is and just drag her out. And even if that didn't work I thought of calling the authority to help the poor she.

I walked to the end of the gutter fully aware of the fact that half of the street was looking at me... Did I see that fair and sexy Gujarati las (Gujarat is a state in North India) at the balcony of her flat smiling at me? Or did I just imagine it? Anyways... I lay flat on my stomach at the end of the gutter and looked in to find out how far I'd have to crawl in it. And what did I see?

OMG! This is not happening to me? How am I ever going to get up and face the ones looking at me? What would happen of the brave hero of that sexy young thing at her balcony? This was one good chance to've impressed her! I felt my heart skip, perhaps, a couple or more of beats. Felt a lump in my throat... I saw my friend lying comfortably and feeding her three new borns!

Why is it that things keep happening to me and just me????

Contemplation, realisation and an approaching death

2009-10-18T21:30:00.000-07:00

This might be a complete shock to many of you who have been following me for a while now. I usually try to be very happy and happening, else very mushy and touchy in my posts. And I was never trying to pretend too. I was trying to build a person in me who can face the world with a smile even at the eve of dooms day. But I think I'm not that. It's not there in me to keep fighting, fighting and fighting with me-self all my life and all alone.

After a long while I ventured to stray into boundaries that was once closed for me. I visited the blog of my "lost-love". And why did I do that? Heaven knows why? It was like some unknown force was leading me there without my will. But unlike before and for the first time ever, I read what she had to say about her life without any pre-conditioned mind set. Usually whenever I visit her blog I dig out a lot of stuff from there to offend me and feel bad and miserable about. But today, I read and re-read a few of her posts and I started realising many things. This life's so confusing, friend. No matter how much you try to seek the answers, they never come to you until they want to, until they have to. And when you do get some of those answers, you wish you had never seeked them 'coz they're so very painful. Maybe that I'm still not grown enough to comprehend many things. Do I wish to grow up? Oh! Yes! Just to escape these pains but otherwise No...

And to see her writing about her new boyfriend whom she ditched me for, I felt... Ah! Can't say. But I can see that she has matured up a lot and is much more at peace with herself. Did I feel happy about it? Can't say. But I sure felt very jealous about her love life. I could see that they act like grown ups which was never the case between us. We did have a lot of fun together, but it was always more like the fun between two children who grew up together. And of course, both of us were kids and very much immature. And my answer to the question - Why didn't she ever value it? - got answered. I also realised why it all appears so important to me still. I don't wish to justify her acts and make me-self look like an all forgiving angel. I'm not. I might forgive but will never forget. And I can't forget 'coz, very immature that I was, I was always very true to that relationship and did every foolish thing that a young boy would do with utmost sincerity to it. It was a phase of my life that transformed me and which is still transforming me.

I'm also seeing the person that she was and is which I could never see then. Do I hate her? No. Am I still angry at her? No 'coz my anger has no relevance what so ever. Then what does she mean to me any longer? I simply couldn't say. All I know is that she's one person who will always stay in my mind all through my life and that very truth somehow hurts me. She's now the most familiar stranger in my life. There was 'something' beyond mere physical attraction and fancies of young raw minds that bound us together for almost 5 long years. And that 'something' seems to be still lingering in me when it has no effect in her. Maybe it's 'coz she's happy with the person in her life and that she needn't feel the loss that I feel. But the fact remains that I'm afraid I'd never be close to anyone in my life as I was with her. And that's not 'coz she'd come in between. It's simply 'coz I rather realize my destiny now. I'm going to be a loner even if there comes another person in my life, and would die a slow, silent and unattended death. My only wish is that I need to die rather early in my life 'coz without my wish or will my life has made a fighter out of me and I see that the best place for a soldier to die is in the war field and when the battle is still on. If he returns, life would be the most cruel to him in spite of his gallantry and heroic deeds. And maybe that's why I'm still smoking so heavily in spite of the apparent dangers it has already shown in me.

A few weeks back we send mails across each other and I said it's very important in my life that we meet at least once. She said she was very busy and would arrange for a meeting sometimes in the coming weeks. Now, why do I want to meet her again? The time that I asked her to meet me was when I felt there was still something in between us which needs to be brought out and get done with for me to lead a happier life. Also I still had my mighty anger brewing in me. But now... After so much going through my head... Why should we meet? I don't know. But I still very much look forward to that meeting. Would it save me from my predicaments? Would that be the ultimate cure for the cancerous memories and thoughts that has spread into my every living cells? Would I come back a happier person or would I shatter to a million pieces that can never be joined together?

I've always taken chances with my life. As I told you, my life has made a fighter out of me without my wish or will. And I have to do it. I have no other options left. I can't give a silent ear to what my heart tells me. I'll have to listen to it and act on it, even if it means that I'd be doomed to death for doing so.

6th of June, 1995

2009-10-17T15:26:00.000-07:00

Today I spend a rather dull, uneventful Saturday. The only productive thing that I did today was visiting all my blog friends that I missed out last week and go through their posts. Though some of their posts did have things to cheer me up, the day couldn't be saved. It was rather doomed to be dull. And you know what happens when my mind becomes empty? Mr. Devil wakes up and makes me write stories and very descriptive ones that is. So get those coke cans out'a your fridge and what ever you'd like to munch on when you get ready for a long read.

This story is about a 12 years old, very naive and a quite little boy who was always alone in a world of his own and his dad. The boy had not many friends and was not in good terms with his mom and his 9 years old sister whom he considered a terror 'coz she always bet him to pulp in a fist fight and the mom always took the side of the victimiser. Though the young boy was a habitual brooder, his dad had imparted in him enough of his interests like music, movies, cricket, adventure, his artistic streak etc. to keep his days going and happening. If you ever walk into that house, most probably than not, you would find the little chap pouring over a colouring book with a tune playing in his lips or curled up in a chair in the living room, lost in sleep and many sweet dreams with the T.V switched on in front of him. If not in these two places, he'd be out on his bicycle exploring the neighbourhood still with a tune playing on his lips and his eyes wide in wonder and veneration for the beauty of the bountiful nature when he rides along the banks of the river in his village or just walking in the paddy fields chasing the cows and the goats grazing in the field or having a light hearted chit chat with the stray dogs.

His best days of any given week was the Saturdays and Sundays when his dad was at home. His dad was an Ayurveda physician in the city not too far away from the village. During the week days the dad and the son were always kept away from each other by work and school. Come Saturday and the boy wakes up, gets his lazy sister out of the bed, brushes his teeth, gobbles up his breakfast with his sis and is out with their cricket kit, all waiting for their dad to get finished with his 2 hour long puja (rituals done for the deity in the prayer room, which was a Shiva Linga in this case), have his breakfast and come out to join them. The game would last till lunch time unless there comes a family friend with his kids or at times patients from far off places for private consultation. After lunch, the guests would leave and the dad, the mom and the sis would go to take a little nap, while the boy would sit in front of the T.V, all bored and browsing through the different channels and finally fall into a deep dreamy sleep 'coz he gets tired after the long hours of playing under the hot sun.

In the evening this family would go for a movie to the cinemas or pay a visit to any one of their other friends. Or even go to the beach and spend the whole evening at the beach, munching on light snacks and the kids playing around their parents. But the best part is the dinner time when the dad would hand feed his two kids and tell them stories from the Hindu mythology and take them along a tour to the historical battle fields of Kurukshetra and Lanka where wars were fought between the good and the evil, the gods and the demons and for a nobler cause, which is very much unlike the wars between the nations that the world has witnessed in reality. Through his many tales on love, nobility, truth and the importance of righteous living, the dad imparted in his kids a sense of value which they would have never got from any of the prestigious schools and universities that they later attended. Post dinner, the dad and the boy would sit across a board of chess while the girl would go to her mom and drift off into her dreams where little fairies in their pink frocks and blue wings would dance around her. 10 out of 10 the dad always wins the game but every now and then he lets his son win. Though not too good at chess, the son was never a fool not to know that his dad was sacrificing his King for the little happiness of his son. But that made him love his dad even more. Not for letting him win, for he never cared for the result in a game so long as he was sure he gave a good fight and enjoyed the game, but for his dad's love for him. On Sundays, the dad would join his kids for their music class and sometimes even sing with them 'coz the tutor was a member of his old music troop and were good friends.

And for the god-dest dad that he was, his son learned, from where no one knows, something that his dad never taught him. The son learned to steal money from his dad's purse. He used the money to buy stickers and posters and crayons that were his biggest passion. Did the dad find out about this? Wait till you read what happened...

It was the dad's b'day and his daughter and mom pooled in money to buy him a nice maroon shirt. The son was never asked to put in what he had. Now don't wonder how these little kids were expected to have money, for the dad gave his two kids a piggy bank each and unfailingly gave them little change to fill in the piggy banks. While the daughter saved all the money, the son was ever eager to spend it on stickers, posters and crayons. So on the eve of his dad's b'day he was bankrupt. He was heart broken to see that his sis and mom had got a b'day present and he had not a shilling left to buy the person that he loved the most in this world, his bestest friend, just anything. But his evil mind told him how he too can get his dad a b'day present.

That afternoon, when everyone were asleep and when his dad was in the bathroom taking a shower, he sneaked into his parents bedroom, opened the cupboard where his dad kept his purse and drew out some money from it. He then happily rode on his bicycle to the nearby textile shop and got his dad a brand new salt and pepper colour socks which he was sure his dad would love. And the next day, when his mom and sis handed the dad his b'day present, the boy just grinned his way into the room and gave the socks to his dad. The dad took one look at the gift and he scooped his son in his hands and gave him a kiss, which the mom or the sis never got. They looked at the boy with such envious eyes that made him feel like the happiest and the most proud soul in this earth. That evening when the whole family was watching T.V, the dad got up and walked into the dining room and called his son from there. The boy sprang up from his seat and ran to his dad. He asked his son to take a seat next to him and he was smiling all the while.

"Now, tell me son and don't lie to me for I know the truth. Do you take money from my purse?"

Now this was a through blow, a mighty big bolt out of the blue. He looked into his dad's eyes for a few seconds unable to do or feel just anything.

"Yes", is all he could say.

"Don't you know it's bad to steal? Well, if you don't, I'm telling you that it's really really bad to steal not just money but anything for that reason"

A few seconds ticked by and the silence was unbearable to the boy. He didn't know what was coming next. Is his dad going to beat him up? Is he going to forsake such a worthless son? Is he going to throw him out of the house for such an evil deed? The weight of his guilt hung on his head. He couldn't face his dad any more. He has shamed a dad as good as he was. What's going to happen next????

"Son. Look at me".

The kid very hesitantly raised his head and looked at his dad. His dad was still smiling at him and that thoroughly unnerved him. "Why is he not angry? Why is he not getting mad at me? After all, I deserve to be punished."

"Come here. Sit near me son".

The boy got up and went near his dad, all scared and weak in his knees.

"I really liked your selection. You got me the colour I like the most. And you do have a fine taste for choosing gifts. No one would have got me a socks for my b'day".

"Now, now... This is unbearable. He is supposed to be beating me into a pulp and throwing me out of the house. He's supposed to be chasing me out off the house telling me never to return. But...", The boy's eyes welled up and he couldn't control his emotions any more. He just hugged his dad and cried and cried and cried and his pathetic sobs were intercepted by him mumbling "sorry" to his dad.

The dad made him sit upright on his lap and took his hand in his and said, "I won't tell this to anyone. Not even to your mom. This is between me and you, all right? Just give me a promise that you'll never do this again".

And the boy has never broken that promise till date. And even overwhelming was the fact that the mom knew about such an incident quite recently when the boy, now a grown up young man, told her about it.

And one late afternoon, the dad walked into the house, looking all tired and exhausted. He asked the mom to turn the water heater on, for he badly wanted a hot shower. He got undressed and wearing just a lungi (a length of cotton cloth worn as a loincloth in India) and nothing to cover his chest, came and sat on a chair in the verandah smoking one cigarette after the other. Now, he was a chain smoker years before and had cut down to 3 or 5 cigarette a day. And this site of him smoking so heavily was very unusual. The boy, being too young to understand this, just looked at his dad puzzled but never approached him fearing he might anger him. After taking the hot shower and the dinner he again came back to the same seat, now with a shot of whisky and another packet of cigarette in his hand. He sat there for a while and came in and complained that the weather was too hot outside and he was sweating profusely. But it was the rainy season and in Kerala, India, where they lived, the month of June is damp and cold and with rains seeping into your skin. For the first time, the mom got an alarm that something was not going right. He just lay flat on the floor on the living room and asked his son to switch on the fan. The boy obeyed and sat next to his dad and saw his face contorting in some excrutiating pain. The kid immediately called up his mom and she rushed to the scene from near the telephone. She was summoning a cab for her kids' dad to be taken to the hospital. The cabby said he'd be there in half hour. The situation got worse as seconds ticked by. The dad was nearly drenched in his own sweat and he kept throwing away the towel that the mom used to mop him and the boy sat near him fanning him with a magazine with all his might. And finally when the cab arrived she rushed him to the hospital leaving her kids with their neighbour.

The daughter, the little kid that she was, complained that she was too sleepy and went to bed with the neighbour's daughter who was her same age and her best friend. But the boy was feeling all restless for a while and then a sudden calm swept over him. He still didn't feel sleepy and he walked around in the neighbour's portico singing all his favourite songs, one song after the other. After almost an hour the telephone rang. The neighbour's wife answered the call. The boy looked at her very curiously while she was talking over the phone. No sign of nothing and even if there was, he couldn't understand anything. The lady came out and said that the he was being summoned at the hospital and that her brother living next door would take him to the hospital. The boy asked her why he had to go to the hospital and the kind lady said that all his cousins and aunts and uncles were waiting to meet up with him at the hospital. But why at such an odd hour of the night? The clock on the wall said it was half past mid night.

The boy couldn't say what but he didn't feel all that good about the situation. Any ways, the lady's brother took him to the hospital and guess what? She was right. Almost all his cousins, uncles and aunts were there, standing around. The cousins who were all older to him looked very dull, the ladies were crying and the men looked very grave. The boy went and stood near one of his cousins and asked him what was wrong? Why were his aunts crying? He said nothing and kept spitting out of the window. The little boy walked around and when the ladies saw him walking towards them, they scared him away by crying even harder. So he decided to be all by he-self. He kept walking around and finally reached a glass door through which he peeked in to see his dad lying on a bed, all smiling and having a little chat with his youngest brother. Should he go in? He couldn't decide and so he walked back to his cousin near the window and stood there waiting for, he didn't know what? About 15 minutes or so passed and he heard the ladies screaming at the top of their voices. This time he knew something had happened. He went near the glass door and saw his dad lying with his eyes closed and with a sweet smile on his face.

The doctors declared him 'dead'!

He had a cardiac arrest and the doctors said the medicines couldn't do him any good 'coz he smoked heavily that day and had liquor in his blood.

Dead? Now, what does that mean? The boy couldn't understand death except that it means there are going to be no more Saturday cricket matches and Chess games 'coz the main striker in his cricket team and his only opponent in those chess games had retired to a never-return land.

His maternal grandpa came to him, when he returned from the hospital and lay flat on the sofa and told him he should not take this too hard and that it's a time for him to act like a real MAN. He smiled back at his grandpa and said, "I know. I understand".

Understand? But what? He never understood death even after 14 years of his dad's demise 'coz he had never been dead in his life!

****************************************************************

And that's the story of me and my dad and this is one of the most 'memorable' days in my life, the 6th of June, 1995.

My dad was very passionate about music and he had a music troop of his own before he got married to my mom. A popular practising physician he was, he was also popular amoung his friends as a singer, a lead guitarist, good at tabala and four other musical instruments (mridangam, jazz drums, veena and mandolin). I've listened to him singing on stage only once and needless to say, I stood there mesmerised at his rendition. And here I'm, all shameful that I cannot even strum a guitar and draw some music out of it. He was the one who introduced me to classical music (both western and eastern), which I still love the most. He was also a good listener and I've seen people coming to him with their emotional problems and seeking his advise. He was also a lead actor in stage plays during his graduation days. And above all, he was the greatest dad and the best-est thing ever to have happened to me.

And I sing this song as a dedication to him. This song is from one of his most favourite of the western singers, Jim Reeves. I've tweaked the lyrics a bit (just replaced "mother" with "father" and "her" with "his").

This world is not my home | Upload Music

People who'd like to get the full lyrics of this song, please visit: www.listen2mesing.blogspot.com

Do Our Stars Lie?

2009-10-16T14:46:00.000-07:00

Now, this has been a topic debated for ages. Does our star sign tell what we are? Is there any truth in star signs and the characters attributed to each zodiac? I, for one, started off being very cynical about this subject. How can all the people born in one zodiac sign be the same? If that is the case then why my dad who was a Capricon and my sister who is also a Capricon are different in their tastes, their thoughts, their reaction to things etc. etc. etc. This question bothered me for a long time. And then one fine day I realized that the issue need to be approached in a different way. I read up on star signs and approached the subject with an open mind, all ready to accept it as a big sham or see if it can convince my rational intellect.

As a first step, I read up on Cancer 'coz that's my star sign and to my surprise most of the things said about a Cancer was very true about me. Here, I scratched my head and started thinking again. How can this be true? In that case, all people born under my star sign should be the same as I'm. But was it so? No. Then I asked one of my friends, who is also a Cancer to read up on her star sign and tell me what she thought about it. And then she calls me up at the middle of the night and says she was over whelmed at what she read about her star sign. She said almost everything that was told about a Cancer was very true to her character. And that shocked me 'coz I knew we were not the same kind. Look at the differences - I sing and always prefer arts to science but she's just my opposite (she's an engineer); I'm a bit of that philosophical kind and she hates philosophising just anything; I love to travel and she hates to get out of her house etc. etc. etc. This really intrigued me. How can there be so many difference between the both of us and yet the two of us feel that we are typical Cancerians? Now, this is a girl who I know from my school days and I know her pretty well though we are not the best of friends. I went back to the description of a Cancer and tried to figure things out and there, the mystery was solve! I realised that there are some similarities between us after all and just that it finds expression in different ways. It's like when I love the classical form of music and keep listening to it around the clock, she's out and out a hard-rock person and I always find her with her ear phones plugged in. But the love for music is something that we share. The difference is only in the type of music we love and that's 'coz of the different family background that we are from, the different kind of social set up that we belong to etc. etc. etc. I went on to find many similarities between us but which were pronounced in different and at times, opposing ways. And then on, I started believing in astrology and star signs though I still prefer to take a very balanced and rational approach to it. I know now that astrology is pure science based on mathematical calculations and like any other science forms, this too is not fool proof or flawless. But there is really something true about this subject.

Now, a little peek into what your star sign tells about you -

AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart ( Jan 20 - Feb 18)
Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality.

PISCES - The Dreamer (Feb 19 - Mar 20 )

Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative.May become secretive and vague. Sensitive. Don't like details. Dreamy and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. A good kisser. Beautiful.

ARIES - The Daredevil (Mar 21 - April 19)

Aries love to race in where angels fear to tread. Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish. Short fuse (easily angered). Lively, passionate, and sharp wit. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly. Easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic.

TAURUS - The Enduring One (April 20 - May 20th)
Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong and has endurance. Solid beings who are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind. Loves hard - passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous.

GEMINI - The Chatterbox (May 21 - June 20)
Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic. Adaptable but need to express themselves. Argumentative and outspoken. Like change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and tense. Gossips. May seem superficial or inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally.

CANCER - The Protector (June 21 - July 22)
Moody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life. Protective. Intuitive, inventive and imaginative. Romantic and passionate but cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others. Easily hurt, but sympathetic. Forgives but never forgets.

LEO - The Boss (July 23 - Aug 22)
Very organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundaries. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Like to help others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous and warm-hearted.
Sensitive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. Doing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive.

VIRGO - The Perfectionist (Aug 23 - Sept 22)
Dominant in relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argumentative. A worry-hat. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hard working. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to. Hard to please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic.

LIBRA - The Harmonizer (Sept 23 - Oct 22)
Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have their own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful and generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible.

SCORPIO - The Intense One (Oct 23 - Nov 21)
Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hardworking. Great kisser. Can become obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive. Determined. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be self-centered at times. Passionate and emotional. If hurt they neither forgives nor forgets.

SAGITTARIUS - The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22 - Dec 21)
Good-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome). Indulges in self. Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes. Beautiful inside and out.

CAPRICORN - The Go-Getter (Dec 22 - Jan 19)
Patient and intelligent. Practical and rigid. Ambitious. Tends to be good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorns tend to act before they think and can be unfriendly at times. Hold grudges. Like competition. Get what they want...

***********************************************
Now this is a very peripheral analysis of the characteristics of each zodiac sign. For reading more into your zodiacs there are millions of websites but the one I found the most convincing was the Universal Psychic Guild. You'll find not just your star signs explained but also an assortment of other things relating to your zodiac. The interested ones can just click the link and be lost in a world that you never knew existed!

I'm well aware that there might be a lot of you who are going to think that I'm some kind of an odd jerk trying to promote something as superstitious as astrology and star signs. Well, you can go ahead and fill my comments column with your swearings at me. After all, no two people are the same in this world and perceptions differ from one person to another.

But I believe in something and fairly so - When a 1 ltr. empty bottle if filled with 1/2 ltr. of water you can choose to call it either half-full or half empty. No matter how you want to look at it, the truth remains that a 1 ltr. empty bottle now has 1/2 ltr. water in it.

Picture courtesy: Printable Tattoo Designs Blog

Superman lives right across your street!

2009-10-15T01:47:00.000-07:00

I have many things to share with you. But let me take this chance to share with you something that grabbed my attention recently. This was a mail forwarded to me by my sister and believe me I was more than astonished! This is no fairytale. This is a true life story. I request all of your attention to this. Please read through carefully.

'I don't feed beggars. They can look after themselves. The mentally ill won't ask anyone for food or money,' says N Krishnan who has been feeding them thrice a day for the past seven years.

He left his bow-tie high paying 5-star job to feed the mentally ill. N Krishnan feeds 400 mentally ill people on the streets of Madurai (A district in Tamil Nadu, India) three times a day, every day, all 365 days of the year. The 28-year-old has been doing this for seven years via a charity called the Akshaya Trust.

A look into the kitchen reveals a spotlessly clean room. Sparkling vessels stacked neatly, groceries and provisions all lined up in rows - rice, dal, vegetables, spices - all of the best quality. One would think this was the kitchen of a five star hotel. Maybe Krishnan achieves that effect because he was once a chef at a five star hotel in Bengaluru (Previously known as Bangalore, Karnataka, India).
"Today's lunch is curd rice, with homemade pickle, please taste it," he says, serving me on a plate made of dried leaves. The food is excellent.

"I change the menu for different days of the week. They will get bored if I serve the same food every day," he says with an enthusiastic and infectious smile.

Krishnan cooks breakfast, lunch and dinner with the help of two cooks. He takes it himself to his wards on the street each day. "I don't feed beggars. They can look after themselves. The mentally ill won't ask anyone for food or money. They don't move around much. I find them in the same place every day."

That morning he put the food in a large vessel, the pickle in a smaller one and loaded it into a Maruti van donated by a Madurai philanthropist.

Ten minutes later we stopped near a man lying on the ground by a high wall. Krishnan put the food next to him. The man refused to even look at it, but grabbed the water bottle and drank eagerly. "He will eat the food later, looks like he was very thirsty," said Krishnan.

At the next stop, he laid the dry leaf-plate and served the food. He then scooped some food and started feeding the mentally ill man himself. After two morsels, the man started eating on his own.

We then crossed a crowded traffic signal and stopped the vehicle. On seeing Krishnan, four individuals moved slowly towards the van. They stood out in the crowd with their dirty, tattered clothes and unshaven beards. They knew this van meant food. But they did not hurry, knowing that Krishnan would wait for them. Krishnan served them under a tree and carried water for them. "They are not aware enough to get their own water," he explained.

And thus we went around the city till the akshaya-patra (In Hindu mythology there is a mentioning of an 'Akshaya-patra' which'd never get empty of food. When ever you take food from it, the vessel (patra) keeps refilling itself magically.) was empty. Of course, it would be full again for dinner later in the day.

As we returned, a startling fact hit me. Not a single mentally challenged person had thanked Krishnan. They did not even smile or acknowledge him. Still Krishnan carried on in a world where most of us get offended if someone doesn't say thank you, sometimes even for doing our jobs.

The food costs Rs 8,000 ($ 175.21 approx.) a day, but that doesn't worry him. "I have donors for 22 days. The remaining days, I manage myself. I am sure I will get donors for that too, people who can afford it are generally generous, particularly when they know that their hard earned money is actually going to the poor. That is why I maintain my accounts correctly and scrupulously." He then pulled out a bill from the cabinet and showed it to me. It was a bill for groceries he had bought seven years ago. "This bill has sentimental value. It is the first one after I started Akshaya."

The economic slowdown has resulted in a drop in the number of donors. Earlier, they sustained meals for 25 days. Software giants Infosys and TCS were so impressed with his work that they donated three acres of land to him in Madurai. Krishnan hopes to build a home for his wards there. He has built the basement for a woman's block which will house 80 inmates, but work has currently halted due to a lack of funds.

This, however, is not the sum of his good deeds. Krishnan also performs the funerals of unclaimed bodies in Madurai. He collects the body, bathes it and gives it a decent burial or cremation as the need may be. He gets calls, both from the municipal corporation and general hospital for the funerals.

He recalls with a little prompting how one day he saw a mentally ill man eating his excreta. He rushed to the nearest restaurant and bought the man five idlis. The man ate voraciously, and then smiled at him. The smile made Krishnan want to do it again and again.

Krishnan has not married and wonders if anyone would want to marry a man who spends his days cooking food for mad men. He is firm that his life partner has to agree to this kind of life.

His parents were initially shocked, but are now very supportive of their son. They advise him about the cuisine and also about how he can streamline the process. One wonders why he left his job in a five star hotel to bury the dead and feed the mentally ill. To this he just smiles and says, "I like doing it." For more information on N Krishnan's trust, log on to:http://www.akshayatrust.org/
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Mr. Krishnan is doing this

** not for a political motive, because they can't vote

** not to convert their religion - their "religion" is irrelevant

** not in expectation of a return from them - what can they give after all?

I was lost deep in my thoughts after reading this. I mean, I never had a job as lucrative as he had. But even if I had, would I have left it to feed the poor and bury unclaimed dead bodies? Do I have the same Superman in me to do such a thing? Had I done anything to make this world a better place to live in? I feel ashamed at the kind'a 'rat-race' life I lead, worrying about my future, complaining about my present, brooding and crying about my past...

Einstein says...

2009-10-14T12:31:00.000-07:00

"Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love."

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."

"A person starts to live when he can live outside himself."

What say people? Do you think this funny looking man is all that funny about what he says?

I love Ingrid...

2009-10-13T10:01:00.000-07:00

A few days back I watched the movie, 'Casablanca' for the seventh time. I always prefer a good romantic comedy or a classy love story over any other type of movies. And that 'coz watching a romantic comedy gives me an insight into one of my favourite subjects - Relationships. Needless to say, 'Casablanca' tells one of the best love stories ever portrayed on screen and I hope there are no arguments to that. But that's not the reason I watch it over and over again. It's for the sheer pleasure of watching Ingrid Bergman, one of the most beautiful ladies ever to have appeared on screen. I know there could be arguments to that statement. But when has beauty been a constant or universal factor, especially when it comes to the beauty of a woman? Perceptions differ and I consider Ingrid to be the epitome of feminine beauty. Now, I'm not going to fill this post describing the beauty of Ingrid. I already did that in a poem that I wrote on the same day of watching that movie. Hence I'd like to take your attention to that poetry - Oh! I lost her in Casablanca. Please click on the title of the poem and it'll take you to my other blog which has the poem.

And while surfing for a pic. of Ingrid, I stumbled on a blog post which I loved for two reasons - It talked about Ingrid Bergman and her life and also 'coz it talked about a most relevant subject - Breast Cancer. I'd request you all to pay a visit to that post - Famous Survivors.... Part One in Series: Ingrid Bergman by Gina Maisano, New York, United States.

The story of my Cat and an Award!

2009-10-12T12:35:00.000-07:00

I'm out and out an animal person and my most favoured pet is a dog. And I got my first dog, Tasha, just a few months back. People who have been following my blog for a while might know this about me already. But for those who are new to my blog and to my existing readers who have missed out on some of my earlier posts, here's a list of my earlier posts you might like to take a peek at:

1. The Rescue

2. OMG! I've sinned!

3. My new Pup - Tasha

4. Baby = Puppy???

5. Why is it better 2 have a dog than a b'friend/g'friend?

6. The ride

7. Dog Vs Cat

8. Tasha'a Day Out

9. OMG! I have PMS???

And all this is an evidence for how excited I was about my new pup. And in that excitement, I ignored my cat which has been around our family since 3 years now. I realised it only when someone mentioned my cat in her comment for my last post. And I'm so thoroughly ashamed about this. Before Tasha came into my life, I come back from work to find him curled up on the sofa of the living room and I never went in my room before I said a "Hi" to him. I used to play with him every night. And used to take a lot of snaps of him and proudly display it on my blog and other sites where I got loads of appreciation for it. He was my top model. But ever since Tasha came home, he started acting like a recluse and the reason is nothing but jealousy. And I too did nothing about it. I simply dismissed his complaints seeking attention. Months passed by and now he has become very old and kind'a cranky because of his old age and I just realised that his days are numbered. The only attention that he gets from us is the three time square fish-meal everyday. Also, he stopped being at home. He goes out after every meal and returns only for his next. Rather sad, I know.

But what has been done has been done and he has become too old and wild to be tamed any more. And after a lot of thinking the only thing I could come up with as a compensation for my miss deed is to honour him with an Award in his name and give it out to all those bloggers who have a pic. of their feline pet on their blog and also to those who has written a poem, an essay or a fiction on cats or anything that belongs to the feline family. That way, though he will never be aware of it, I can honour him for the nice little thing that he was to my family.

There's a brief little story I want to tell you about Malu (that's his name) - My mom and sis found him when he accidentally jumped in front of my sis's scooter. They instantly took a liking for this abandoned little kitten and brought him home. To begin with, they thought it was a she-cat and hence named him Malu, which is a feminine name in my country (the first injustice done to him and I can't be more sorry about this). By the time we realised that ours was a male cat, the name had already got stuck to him and was impossible to change it. He was a puny, sickly cat when he was brought home but was very active and energetic and thus filled the life of my mom and sis with a lot of amusement and fun. At that time, I was living away from home and by the time I returned home, he was a 4 month old kitten, still small in size for his age. Nevertheless, he continued to amuse us all with his different feline antics. And we returned his love with feeding him with rich food like chocolates, butter cookies and of course his regular three-times-a-day fish-meals prepared exclusively for him. It was at those times that I had discovered my interest in photography and he proved to be an effective model for my photo shoot experiments. We had great times together. But ever since he became two years old, he started spending less time at home. Those typical male instincts for sex and new found pleasures kept him out of our home and we missed him a lot. He made a lot of friends and even had his good times with a couple of femme felines. But he always returned home for his meals. And then came the house shift and that made him feel very lonely and scared in his new surroundings. For the first few days he was home bound and shuddered at the calls of other neighbourhood cats. But he was lured to the outside world by a clever female who he tried to woo for a long time but never succeeded. He became heart broken and started becoming a loner, a brooder and a total recluse. He used to be away from home for days together trying to seek acceptance and love across boundaries, I guess. But I'm forced to believe that those attempts failed for he returned home all shattered and a total wreck with scars and deep cuts at every odd places on his body. But by that time, Tasha was home and that was a total blow to all his hopes. The rest is history...

Also let me take you through a few pics. of Malu in his growing up days -

And that's it. I can't take pics. of him any more 'coz I hardly see him around in my house.

Anyways... Here is the award to the millions and zillions of proud cat owners in the blogger's world. Please pass this on to all those who you think deserves it.

As in any other Awards, there are two rules to be followed here. Don't worry, you don't have to give this out to any specific number of people. This is simple -

1. Don't give it back to the person who gave you this award 'coz I don't want this award to be thrown around in between people.

2. Please mention the story of Malu when you're giving out this award 'coz making him popular in here is the soul purpose of this award. That's the honour I want to endow on him - that he's noticed by the world if not me and that his name will be remembered for a long time now.

* You needn't get this award to pass this on to others. Just grab it and give it to those deserving people.

To begin with I'm handing over this award to three people who comes to my mind immediately -

1. ER @ WHERE MOUNTAINS MEET THE SEA

2. SupahMommy @ Advetures of a wanna-be SupahMommy

3. Fireblossom for her poem - A Few Facts About Tigers

OMG! I have PMS???

2009-10-10T23:03:00.000-07:00

First of all, let me apologise for disappearing without any announcements. No. It was not my engagement or honeymoon. My internet connectivity was having her PMS or something, I guess, throwing tantrums and going on occasional mood trips and finally she shut down for good. And I think I don't have to tell you (women) more about how it is when you go through a PMS period, do I? Well, even if I had to, I wouldn't be able to 'coz I'm a guy and never had experienced such a thing in my 26 long years in this world. But someone has a different opinion!

Guess, what? I was having a mailing session with a fellow blogger and after the customary "Hi! How are you?" mails, we got into a bit of personal details of our life. It's amazing how I'm making friends easily now-a days considering the very serious and faking-maturity-kind of a person that I used to be. Ever since I started blogging seriously since June of this year, I've made at least 3 or 4 friends with whom I feel all at ease with. And I me-self noticed the difference in my interaction with strangers - I've become easily approachable and someone who can maintain a light veined conversation. Better even, I can understand a joke and can even crack a couple of them at times! Again, thanks to my break-up. I'm sorry I have to mention this every now and then. It's useless to deny the importance of that event and the person involved in my life. I mean, good or bad, it has made me what I'm today and frankly, I don't find me-self any worse than before. In fact, the responses that I'm getting from both outside and my inner voice tells me that I've become a better person.

Anyways... That's not what I was talking about, were I? But what was I talking about? Let me think... hmmm... (scratching my chin and at times by butt 'coz the blisters of chickenpox has started to dry off and it's still bothering me at some of the odd geographies of my body). Ah! Ye! My blogger friend, PMS...

Ok. We were getting into bit of private talks and she told me she is suffering from Sinusitis. Later that day I had a chat with one of my friends who's a doctor and discussed her with him. He suggested certain medications and I carried his message for her in the next mail. But since I was going through rather an emotional phase 'coz of a mail from my lost-love, I also said I've not been keeping well emotionally since a few days. She asked me what was bothering me but I dismissed it. Not 'coz I was any reluctant to discuss about it with her. No. Definitely not. In the very few mails that we send across, our friendship had taken a rather good turn. It was like we were just waiting to get introduced to each other. But I've taken this oath not to talk about that break-up or anything that happened until and unless the situation demands so. Besides, it's nothing exciting or amusing to talk about, is it?

I'm again going on a tangent here... Let me get back to my original topic. Hmmm... Yes! I told her I was going through an emotional phase since the last few days and there she sends a mail back in response asking me to take the PMS out of my system! Now, as I told you, I'm not someone too bright with wits and I'm only learning the trade now. I got a bit confused with her response. I suspected she took me for a girl and so I send her a mail back explaining that I'm a guy! Excerpts from my mail - "I'm very much a guy, 26 year old, a bachelor, a bit weird by other's standards, smokes, drinks very occasionally and in the look out for a possible match in a girl ('coz I'm no gay)!". I know, that sounds funny (See what I told you that I'm just learning the tricks of delivering wits).

And I went on to explain why I have mood swings. It's 'coz my zodiac sign is Cancer and I seems do full justice to the characteristics of a Cancer - emotional, sensitive, unpredictable mood swings etc. etc. etc. But associating this with PMS was something very new and amusing too!

I always had and still has this secret wish (no longer a secret now) to transform into a girl and live a few months with all the PMS, the guys ogling at me and even swap pregnancy with my girl (if and when I have one). I've two intentions behind this wish. One is to experience it me-self what it takes to be a woman in this world and the second one is to save my girl of the pain of pregnancy for I've heard 95% of the women crying and complaining about these two things that they have to undergo in their lives. Now, I know this is my, and would remain a, fancy of the most weird kind.

And, that's all about me-self having PMS. Did you expect to read something more amusing? I'm sorry to've disappointed you.

Another thing that happened in this last few days was that my dear little girl, Tasha has developed a new fondness for banana peels and hunts for one whenever I take her out for a walk. Also, as if that's not enough, she chewed up my mobile phone! The display of it has gone for a toss but it still works otherwise. At least, I can still listen to all those lovely melodies that I've stored in it.

Also take a look at what I made for Tasha (I got that pic. from Google images) -

Now, this is hanging at the gate of my compound. Nothing much to brag about. This is a simple photoshop work. Nevertheless I'd like to know what you feel about it.

My Fist Blog Award

2009-10-07T10:37:00.000-07:00

First and foremost let me apologize for not attending to this for the past few days. I have my own explanations for it.

Ah! This is a feeling that can never be compared. An AWARD for my bolg! I'm over the top for this wonderful recognition and I very much thank Steven Anthony @ No Excuse, No Explanation... for giving me this award. In his words - "Ekanthapadhikan over at The truth about me self. This guy is truly amazing. He writes, sings and acts..and does it all beautifully". Never felt so recognised before. And to say a bit about Steven, he's my first blog mate and frankly, I don't remember how we came across each other. He's a Cook, a Writer who writes about different things from his traumatic childhood to erotic or funny things and also someone with a very critical fetish for foot. Now, did you hear that last one right? Yes FOOT and not food or anything else. You must pay a visit to his blogs (Man Dish, No Excuse, No Explanation..., and Walk This Way) to know him better. Just click on those blog names and you'll reach his home...

Once again, THANKS TO YOU STEVEN!

And now the difficult part of receiving this award - The rule says that I need to give this award to 15 other bloggers. Now, this sounds very difficult a task for me 'coz I follow more than 15 bloggers very regularly and can't say one is better than the other. I mean, people write about different things - sometimes personal life, poems, short story, funny incidents etc. etc. etc. How am I going to pick 15 from the 50 + bloggers that I follow? But a Rule is a Rule (something that I don't really care for) and I'm obliged to follow it at least this one time 'coz I know how someone would feel happy to be recognised in such a manner and I'm going to pick them in random. And this is my chance to bring a smile to at least 15 other people in this world. And if you've already got this award, please excuse me. And there's nothing wrong in getting it a second or third time, isn't it? It only means that you're all worth it. And I avoid Steven from my awarding list 'coz it makes no sense to give him back an award that he gave me.

So here I go:

Supah Mommy @ Adventures of a Wanna-Be SupahMommy - This awesome lady has redefined the blogging world. Besides her bone tickling posts that'd never fail to give you the laugh of your day, she also use her blog space for a hundred other things. I admire this lady for the way she lives her life in a wholesome manner.

Kelly Muys Wood @ Tearing up houses - This is another lady who is a land lord who became a blogger. I mean, that's the best way to define her. Apart from her few personal life incidents, she almost always gives us an insight into the life of a land lord and a tenant. Following her blog gives you better ideas of how to be a good land lord or a tenant. I find this very useful.

Kaiserin Sisi @ RAMBLINGS OF A HOTELIER'S WIFE - Her every one post is different from the other. She talks about weekend trips to exotic places, about going for parties etc. etc. etc. But frankly, I give her this award for her one post that made my day when I was feeling too down. This is the one in which she posted the video of a Malaysian singer and the song and the rendition was simply heart warming. I visited and re-visited this post a hundred times since she posted it. You can just click on the link and find out why I had to give her this award for that one single post. Thank you, for introducing me to such a lovely song.

She Poet @ She Poet - She expresses her thoughts in verse and I haven't seen much people doing it so well.

Fireblossom @ Word Garden - I've too little words to talk about this writer who word-sculpts poetry. She has never failed to amaze me since I started following her blog. I'd rather call her a Word Sculptor than Fireblossom.

Betty Manousos @ CUT AND DRY - She's been getting one Award after another for the past few days and all for the right reasons. I mean, she deserves it for the kind of things she share with us. And here's one more for you, Betty. I know you already got this award. But I couldn't ignore you from this list.

Kim @ Thinking out Loud - She's a prolific writer and in her own words - she's an "Aspiring writer, avid reader, definite Francophile, wanna-be photographer, animal lover, and a serious night owl!". And she means all that she claims to be, honestly!

Extremity @ EXTREMITY - She's another one of my very favourite poetess for more than one reason. That she's a Muse of some specific quality is undeniable. Her poems are rather short but very expressive in imagery and are pregnant with many thoughts that any young girl can relate to. Also she's someone who's close to home and I can relate to her thoughts in a way that makes me feel closer to my land.

Gloria @ GLORIA'S SPANISH VIEW - Now, she's someone who takes her dogs out for a swim in a lake and call it their swimming pool. I mention this about her 'coz that's the first thing that comes to my mind and that simple action talks volume of what she is - someone's who's loving, caring and someone who takes interest in the simpler and much subtle things in life. Her blog reflects exactly what she's. It's worth visiting.

Matthew @ AbodeOneThree - Now, here's a man who has got a natural flair for writing things in a very descriptive style. And believe me, he's a natural story teller and it's always a pleasure and a good read every time you visit his posts. You wouldn't miss your novels lying in your shelf if you can regularly visit his blog.

Azaad @ INFINITE EMOTIONS... - Ah! Another aspiring writer from my own country. If the other girl was natural with verse, this one is as natural with the prose style. She has her own style of story telling that keeps you gripped. Not that every one of her post is a story per say. She also experiments with poetry and other styles of writing.

Brian Miller @ waystationone - Here's another one of my few male followers. And I really don't have words to mention what his blog is. But the man, writes his stories, real life ones and others in a style so lucid and free of any 'stumbling blocks' that you get addicted to his posts. Also he's the only male Poet I've come across in this blogging world so far. If you add him in your 'Blogs I Follow Tab', I'm sure you'd keep an eye open for every post in his blog.

DannyD @ Signifying Nothing: My Stories - And this is a young chap who's doing a great job through his blog. He writes about contemporary news in the web world. Agreed that his posts might appear a bit dry for most of the readers but believe me, he has got a wealth of knowledge in his chosen field and he's good enough to share it all with us. But the 'dryness" is just to do with the subject he deals with as you know how difficult it is to spice up technical news. But I'm sure, one look at his blog will make you appreciate this this guy's efforts and hence this award for him.

ALICE IN WONDERLAND @ ALICE IN WONDERLAND - Yet another one of my favourite blogger. She writes poetry, shares pics. of her cats and what more? Makes your day feel good with her every post.

Eva Gallant @ Wrestling with Retirement - Now, she's someone I admire the most in this blogging world. Wonder why? 'coz I've never seen someone taking life the way she do in her age. She's humerous, serious and her blog is a catalogue of many nostalgia that she holds close to her heart. "Hat's off" is the least I can say to her at this occasion.

Now, let me take the levity to hand over this award to two more persons I love to follow and has ever been doing so. You can visit their blogs and find out why I couldn't resist giving out this award to these two.

Cathy Clementz @ YOOPER YARNS & Vodkamom @ VODKAMOM

And I know, considering the nature of this award, that many of you might have got this award already. But when I was asked to give out this award to 15 other people I couldn't resist making use of this opportunity to tell each of you how much I love you all and how glad that I'm in such good company.

Last but not the least, kindly excuse me if I've missed someone in this. As I told you, this was a mighty task for me 'coz 15 is not a number for me to share my happiness with. There are other bloggers I follow religiously and love to read each and every of their posts.

Once again, Thank You Steven and Thank You all for giving me the encouragement through your many comments on my posts. My life has really changed ever since I befriended you all.

LOVE,
EKAN

And a bit of blowing my own trumpet quite aloud from my side. These are also the reasons why I got this award -

Just Gibberish...
Ekan Learns To Sing...
My Photoblog

You can click on any of them and find out.

"Sorry seems to be the hardest word"

2009-10-06T06:03:00.000-07:00

I'm was having a slight fever since yesterday night and that's not a good sign. I mean, I just recovered from chickenpox and if this is a re-occurrence, that's going to be really bad. These are moments when my heady enthusiasm for life and experiences and my mighty optimistic attitude fails me. All I want now is to get someone to be by my side and tell me that I'm not alone in this world. Now, do I sound very touchy and all... But that's just what I'm - a 'touch-me-not or I'll die' kind. I called up my office and took a day off work and was just checking my mails when... Well...

I went through rather a very emotional phase and feel all drained and exhausted now. The reason? A mail from someone who was a big part of my life in the past - my Lost Love. She wanted to share with me a good news that she might soon get her first book published! Aha! And that's a great news indeed and I can imagine how much she'd have been thrilled at this 'coz I know how much she wanted this to happen. It's a dream come true for her and I could sense her heart's elation from her mail. But after congratulating her on her success, I typed a rather long mail putting down all that I ever wanted to tell her - about how bad she made me feel during our break-up and how much I messed up my life because of that. I still don't know why I did that? I posted that mail as my previous post and deleted it. Some of you must have read it and if you ask me why I deleted it, I've a good reason to do so. Read further to know.

Though I never expected a reply for that mail, there she sends me a mail trying to rationalise things with me and pointing out to me that it was very indiscreet on my side to have written about my personal life that involved her in an open space like a blog where millions (some common acquaintances also) would read it. Though she never blamed me for it in harsh terms, she did say that I did rather ruthlessly character assassin her. I must admit that she was the most gentle in her tone though she never really understood what prompted me to do so. Ah! But that's no justification for what I did. What right and what nobility was on my part to have talked so openly about a girl's character and that too in a country where the life of a woman is horrible in a million other ways? Now, I must admit that it was indeed very un-gentlemanly and shameful on my part to have done that and the only justification I can give for doing so is that her actions had hurt me like hell and gave me the 'life in a hell' for almost an year and a half. Besides, I never meant to assassin any character, or talk ill of someone or show someone in any bad light. I was just stating some facts and was trying to push off many disturbing images from my mind. Previously, I tried to do that by many other means. I went to councillors, underwent medications but nothing worked. And then I found solace in shouting out aloud through silent words to many strangers about my pains. It's my haunting loneliness and the nightmares of those bad moments that drove me insane enough to commit such a hideous deed. I was experimenting with a process of self purgation of cleaning my mind of the hurts that lie so deep in me. And many of you might be familiar with people doing the same in this blog space. And I know these are not the least justifications for what I did.

Seems like there's still a lot of dirt in me to be cleaned. But how would I ever do it?

I know this means nothing and would never be enough to mend any damage that I caused (If I did and I pray not much harm has been done). All I could do is delete that post which talked about my break up with her. And also, shout out aloud in silence that I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY... A MILLION TIMES. But as I've mentioned in that post that I removed, this "SORRY" is just an excuse for my evil deeds and I'm extremely shameful about it. I take an oath never to do it again. Here onwards I'll never even use that derogatory term "X" in my posts if and when I've to mention her (And I'll have to mention her at one point or the other 'coz, good or bad, she's the reason for what I'm today). I'll address her as my "Lost Love". I'm really ashamed that I addressed her with just an alphabet in English and deprived her of any respect that she deserved not as my previous girl friend but as a human being.

I could see how much she was hurt with me mentioning her as my "X" and showing no discretion in talking about her miss deeds. I realise I've been very unkind to her. All I can say is that my head is held down in shame and I dare not look into a human eye and say I did all that. I'm humbled and am utterly ashamed of my indiscreet ways.

So, dear blogger friends, kindly forgive me on her behalf and I ask me-self to forgive me-self too, for it's the worst thing to live with such a guilt. I respect women and the position they have in this world though I may not be good at handling them.

If not my other posts, I really want everyone to read this and I might probably send her the link with all your responses if that could be anything of a compensation for what I did.

I repeat and I mean it - I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY... A MILLION, A BILLION, A TRILLION TIMES...

And I very well know that always "Sorry seems to be the hardest word".

Me, an actor? Check this out!

2009-10-03T09:29:00.000-07:00

Ahm! I've been long wondering how I could share this with you until I found this site called www.tinypic.com.

Nothing much to brag about but this is a video project in my graduation days in which I was given a chance to act in a short film titled 'The Rejected'. "Given a chance" is actually an under statement. Actually they came to me as a last resort because none was ready to take up the role. And why? 'coz the role needed the actor to play the part of a Gay! And yes, like in any other part of the world, same-sex relationship is as much a hot topic in India. Though there are people who boasts themselves to be very open to this, in reality, I've seen the same people twitch their eyebrows when they come across someone who admits themselves to be a gay or a lesbian.

Now, let me not take any hypocritical stand here. I, personally, don't give a damn about who sleeps with whom but me-self being a 'straight' when it comes to sexual orientation, I wouldn't want my girl to come and say that she slept with a women and expects me to "take it cool". I wouldn't be, and probably that would be the end of any relationship with her. It's ok if she tells me that she just discovered that she has lesbian tendencies and would continue to be my friend 'coz she values whatever that's between us. But if she asks me to be "all right with it" or "take it in the right spirit"... Well... Now, now, don't twitch those eyebrows of yours. I'm not showing any attitude here or flaunting a chauvinistic side of mine. I've had people behaving so stupid to me and still hold their head high and say that it's my narrow mindedness that couldn't accept things as it is. I mean, how does anyone expect me to be all right with absurdities like cheating me or pelting such shocking facts about life at me and still smile back at them and say, "It's all right. I can understand"? The fact is I don't understand such things 'coz I'm not that. But I wouldn't be arrogant enough to say that I'll never learn about it. Just give me some time... Ok! Ok! Let me not go into those things.

Coming back to the original topic, my (I was doing my B.A in English Lit.) friends in another department (Video and Mass Communication) approached me and asked me whether I had gut enough to take up the role of a gay in their short-film. And I didn't have to think twice before saying a "Yes". Not because I wanted to prove my guts but 'coz I love to be on stage and I like it more if it is anything challenging. Let me not talk too much and spoil the fun.

For those who might find it difficult to follow the story line, this is about how an unassuming guy (John) discovers himself to be a gay when he befriends a class mate (Rahul and that's me) of his and how it finally leads to his suicide. I'm the bearded guy (Rahul) in the film.

And guess what? This one scored the maximum points in the final evaluation among the four amateur video projects that were submitted. I don't know what exactly happened to the copy that I'm having but the picture quality seems to have gone a bit bad. It looks a bit too dark in the beginning. Maybe the problem is with the resolution of my monitor! Personally, what I love about this film is the background score. I found it very haunting and it sets the whole tone of the film. Never realized we had such talented people among us!

Original Video - More videos at TinyPic

Stumbling up on a piece of memory

2009-10-02T23:04:00.000-07:00

I was cleaning up my shelf today morning and I stumbled up on a piece of memory from my graduation days. This is a book titled 'Aadyaksharangal' meaning 'The first letters', a compilation of 10 poems in Malayalam by one of my class mates, Manu and three short stories in English by me-self. The book was published by another one of our college mates. It wasn't a huge success as we expected it to be. The 100 copies (you can see how much of a modest and experimental attempt this was) that were printed were hardly sold out. I remember a couple of my friends walking around the campus trying to sell it like it were some fancy products. No marketing techniques worked. The books lay stacked in our shelves for days. The problem was it's pricing. It came out with a price tag of Rs. 20.00. Now, I was always against this. Though I never studied economics or marketing, I'm a keen observer of the market movements and was quite (I still am) convinced that the books would have sold like hot cakes if it was priced at Rs. 19.00 or even say, Rs. 18.50. I'd agree that the margin of profit would have been affected but it was still negligible. Besides, we didn't come out with this for any monetary benefits, did we? At the least, I never considered it to be so. I did argue with the other two about this but they never listened. And I don't think my argument can ever be proved, now. But, friends, tell me - didn't I have a point there?

Anyways... That's not what I wanted to tell you all about. One of my friends (my best friend) wrote the preface for my short stories and reading it now... Ah! Can't tell you how I feel about it. I'm going to put down that piece of writing in exact words as he wrote it -

Dear friends,

It gives us the greatest pleasure to introduce the writing of our fellow student, Sambhu Sankar, not only as personal friends but as those who have watched and enjoyed his development as an artist. From constrained fluttering at the beginning to full fledged careful stories with his own distinctive style, it has been as much single pointed determination and hard work on his part as inspiration.

What we find most appealing in his stories is a native tang, a distinctive Indianess that expresses urban life as we college students know it. What makes his writing so enjoyable and believable is how it deals with the emotions and feelings of ordinary people and situations such as any of us may encounter in our lives.

We do not claim that the stories are perfect. Far from it, however, we hope that the reader would receive this collection as the creative attempts of a budding writer than the accomplishments of a seasoned professional and take these stories to heart in the same way that we have done.

Govind Krishnan V

Look at the way he introduced me. It couldn't have been better. Reading it, I felt that the preface was many times better and well written than my stories. Needless to say, Govind is a prolific writer himself. Poetry is his forte and believe me, I've not seen someone of his age writing on subjects as deep and with an insight of things as he does. Currently, he works as a journalist with a leading news daily in my country (A job that he took up after many considerations and re-considerations). I've been lucky enough to have befriended him, though we are not much of in touch these days. Our lives seems to have taken different routes and I don't think I can make any complaints about that. I mean, that's what life is all about, right?

And for those who're interested, you can read one of the stories (Sneak-peek is a funny business!) that I had in that book by clicking here. Also I've got another story (The Encounter) that I completed yesterday in there. Click here to get to that story page. Do leave your critical comments. Your responses would go a long way in making me an established story teller that I aspire to be.

It's finally over...

2009-10-01T09:16:00.000-07:00

And that's my place (not my home, though) on a rainy day (Kerala, India)

There's been continuous rain since the past few days. This is very unlikely at this time of the calender in my place. But since, I've been home bound for the past three weeks, it really doesn't make much difference to me except for the fact that I'm having cooler nights to cuddle under my blankets.

And the greatest news of the day is that I was allowed to take a bath. And what an elaborate ritual it was? Turmeric paste was dabbed all over me and the water was boiled with neem leaves in it. What more? Coconut oil for my hair that was unwashed for ages and above and besides all this, NORMAL FOOD!!! Ah! I almost cried when I tasted a bit of spicy food. The feeling was so overwhelming, I tell you! Never knew the normal home food tasted sooooooo gooooood!!! And ah! It's finally over... Now, it's bed rest with normal food since Sunday and I'd be back to office by Monday! Can't wait to see them all again. But what about these marks on my face? Am I going to scare them all? Would they feel repulsed looking at my face? Ah! I don't know. Can't help it anyways. They'll have to get used to seeing my ugly scared face and I'll have to get used to awkward glances.

Another piece of news is that I finished the story that I've been bragging about. I know this isn't my best. But I've been contemplating over this plain-just-plain love story but with an ironical twist for a while. I started writing it almost a month ago and could not think of a fitting climax for it. I still don't think I've got it. But I can't wait any more. I mean, patience has its limits too. So here I'm with the latest addition to my creative writing blog - It's a short story titled 'The Encounter' (Please click here to get to the story page). I'm not too happy with the title either. But as I said - patience has its limits. Can't wait any more.

Friends, please visit my other blog - Just Gibberish... and let me know what you think about the story.

Excuse me, please...

2009-10-01T04:24:00.000-07:00

I know, I've not been writing since a couple of days. I've got a good reason for it. Guess what? I'm working on a short story nearly after an year and it's taking away much of my time. And I'm not writing much 'coz I'm saving words for the story. Now, does that sound funny? Maybe. But it's a fact. My vocabulary is something so very meagre and I don't want to use up all words in my head for anything else right now. Hope I'll be able to give the finishing touch to the story by today and I'll soon put it up in my other blog. So till then, excuse me please!

But here's the chance for you to take a peek into my other blogs. I do maintain a variety of them. Here are the links -

1. Creative writing (Poems & Short stories) @ Just Gibberish...
2. Photography @ My Photoblog
3. Listen to me sing @ Ekan Learns To Sing...
4. Travel writing @ Where The Roads Take Me...

Your responses to my attempts matter a lot to me. Looking forward to meet you all in my other blogs too!